Interview with Self-Help Coach Steph Hannah (Wild Moon Oasis)

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[00:00:57] Welcome aboard. We have Steph Hannah, the Self-Mastery Mentor. I figured with all the mental health and discussions and better living and just other great talents we had on, I was like, I gotta have this persona on. And again, many personas like you have figured out Instagram, like without fail, especially personal coaches. I'd see so many of these ads in Instagram form pop up and instantly it sells me. I'm like, gotta talk to this person, gotta take their class.

[00:01:27] But welcome. Thank you for doing this. For here on out, we're going to discover about how you formed Wild Moon Oasis. Absolutely. Thank you for having me. For sure. So Self-Help, you know, there's, it's been a thing for years, you know, but now that it's in the digital age, it's so different from, you know, just about everyone in the 80s and 90s had a self-help book series, you know, as like now it's in digital form.

[00:01:51] Let's start from the top. How did you get into this and decide you had a, your variation to share as both your business model and as your voice? Well, I would say that my coaching career actually started as a hairstylist. Oh, nice. I spent 17 years behind the chair, really listening to people, to humans. And I really enjoy studying the patterns and finding the common denominator behind people's pain points.

[00:02:20] And from men to women, I, and all ages and demographics, my job really exposed me to a lot of humans. At their most intimate level, I got to hear more than a therapist, their, their highs and their lows over, over a decade of, of spending a lot of time with them. And I quickly learned that most people are really misinformed. Yes.

[00:02:50] They are really misguided as far as not only how to hear their own inner voice, but who to trust. And, and I, I watched so many people go down rabbit holes for years and not get answers to their, not only their emotional patterns and their mental health issues, but also their symptoms and the signals of their body. Yes.

[00:03:17] And so I went down my own journey of identity and being a hairstylist and then a very successful salon owner. And in that career, I was pushed to my extremes as far as my schedule and the demand. And I ended up experiencing my own health issues.

[00:03:41] And so I became the common denominator of what most humans were experiencing was just mass confusion about how to feel better and listen to their body. And my job made me really press against that. My job forced me to show up no matter how I felt. Mm-hmm.

[00:04:04] And I went through breast implant illness where I had a, I had a ruptured silicone implant for five years that I didn't know about that was just slowly killing me. And so I, in that moment, I decided to go back to school for nutrition. And I didn't know that that was what was wrong with me, but I knew that something was really robbing my health.

[00:04:33] And I knew that doctors weren't going to help me because my symptoms were so. Yeah. You've heard it all. And it's always like, well, so that's even worse than the last discussion. I need a win. Not this will hurt less or this will save you five more years. I'm like, I don't want anything that costs me my life, you know? Yeah. I kept hearing from doctors that my blood work was normal and there was no way that with how I was feeling was normal.

[00:05:03] I have been sober for 14 years. I exercise every single day. I have a yoga and meditation practice. So for me to feel really ill, I knew something was wrong and I could not get answers from doctors. And again, I sounded just like my clients and I was like, I'm going to go to school for this.

[00:05:28] So I went to school for holistic healing through food, where basically I learned what foods treat, what symptoms. And I started treating myself. And then quickly my clients started to pick up on this and they were like, what are you doing? And I started coaching them behind the chair and I would give them, I would give them nutrition and exercise advice.

[00:05:55] And then six weeks later when I would see them, they would be better. And I was like, how is some little old me capable of healing people when these doctors have been not giving them any answers? So I kept going, essentially. I gained momentum from being behind the chair.

[00:06:17] And then I started building like an online presence as well as taking my physical clients even further. And I built a home salon with a home gym and a home. I don't have any kids or a husband. So I basically just created a wellness center inside my home where I could coach women and also do their hair.

[00:06:42] So I ended up extremely burnt out. I ended up myself being that extreme high achiever. I felt like everything that I wanted to share with the world, I would just give it and give it and give it. Until one day I felt completely depleted in my hair identity.

[00:07:08] And I felt completely compelled to continue with my coaching. And so I got pulled in that direction and started realizing that I could guide people not only away from their poor food choices, but also from their habits and patterns of self-sabotage nature.

[00:07:33] And I realized all my time as a hairstylist, all I ever really was was a mirror. I gave people an opportunity to see themselves through me, through them. And in that transaction, I'm more of like the shine. I shine the flashlight for you.

[00:07:56] And so that's really been like my journey to coaching as far as attached to one identity and now blossoming into this awesome purpose and passion. And I can see where the bridge between the two have led me here.

[00:08:18] And so really my intent is to help people see that they have their own inner wisdom, that their answers are actually deep inside of them. And the trick, the catalyst to mind-body-soul connection and healing is really learning how to sit with yourself.

[00:08:43] Learning how to spend time listening to your own voice, asking yourself really honest questions, and then learning how to connect your mind to your muscle so that when you move through space and time, you are actually creating your reality around you. You are not just sitting in this experience. You are driving it. So not to cut you off too much.

[00:09:13] I think that is just so well stated, though, because I think you want to talk reality. I mean, this is why we've seen some of our crazy neighbors. They're living on a different planet watching bad stuff on TV. But I think that does much like bullying and what other mental health podcasts have discussed. A lot of it's so many insecurities. It sounds like you, from the summary, especially after addressing so many clients and then working on yourself,

[00:09:42] you have figured out, I'm going to stop any other insecurities, any other negative energy from channeling before it has a chance. And it kind of makes me wonder, you know, it's like, where was this years ago? Why were so many in denial? It's like, oh, you'll get over it. It's like some people don't because the negative energy is so damning. It is so awful.

[00:10:06] To just vent that, you know, it doesn't happen with just two hours of, oh, that was bad, but now it's better. It's like, no, this is not just a boo-boo. I got a bandaid. So I like how you have. You progressed to this and you have definitely kept a diary. Both physical and mental is like where you can just say, here's where I want to correct this step. Here's where I want to be truthful with myself.

[00:10:32] And I mean, I do applaud you, though, for starting off in hairstyling. This is like because, again, a lot there's many who are good at it, but they're not people persons. So that's already a contrary thing. It's kind of like as someone who can be a teacher, but they're not good around kids. Well, we got a problem. It's probably not a good fit. But was that where you kind of wanted to do for life before you then said, no, let me go back and restudy?

[00:11:02] My original intention when I became a hairstylist was I wanted to pick a passion where I knew I could literally make the world a more beautiful place. And I was 18 when I went into hair school. And to think with that naive mind, that young, fresh mind to come up with that and articulate it just like that.

[00:11:30] Now with my adult brain, I'm like the intent is exactly the same. It's just that the beauty that I'm describing is not on the outside. Mm hmm. Yes. Well, yeah, so it's a mirror. So if anything, this still did more for you. I mean, the mirror says so many things that even our mind can't comprehend, but it does kind of speak.

[00:11:58] I know this sounds kind of pretentious, but I kind of get what you're saying, though, whereas like. So the coolest thing about being a hairstylist and I need you to visualize this. Sure. I'm with you. So I sat a lot. I was the kind of stylist who had a cutting stool. And so I navigated behind you similar to like a doctor rolling around a room in one of those chairs. And so I'm I'm not above you.

[00:12:25] I'm basically at the same level as you, but I'm right behind you. And so how many conversations that are deep and intimate do you have with another human where they're actually behind you at the back of your head? Not often. And there's no real eye contact except what happens through the mirror.

[00:12:47] And so when you go real deep with your words and you start speaking your truth, I may cower and duck in my chair and get behind you so that you're actually speaking to you through the mirror. And then that energy hits me behind you. But it hits me above you and it circulates around me. And I get to hear your frequency at a whole different plane than you do.

[00:13:18] And it's and it's backed by so much of your truth and vulnerability because there's no real eye contact exchange. And we're at the same level. So it's kind of like a physical kind of therapy kind of class or a fitness class. You're kind of circling around. But instead of going one by one, checking on one person, you're actually collected.

[00:13:41] I'm dialed in on your energy and you're safe to say and feel whatever because I'm not threatening you with direct eye contact, but I'm also touching you while I'm performing a service on you while you're while I'm talking while you're talking to me. So there's this whole intimate exchange where and then over a decade of that every four, six, eight weeks.

[00:14:09] I mean, I saw a lot of women more than they saw their own daughters. Oh, wow. And so especially their own doctors, their own therapists. Like I got to see women like nobody missed their appointment with me. Nobody. Nobody. Well, so that's that's a genuine energy. And like you say, you've observed it.

[00:14:31] So there's no refuting that is like and you didn't even have to see them at the front desk say, I want to speak to Hannah, you know, as the stylist this time is like it. It just automatically happened. But when did you kind of feel the actual self counseling kind of energy? Just the mental reward, would you say?

[00:14:56] Like, when did that become very apparent and to where you were like, now I need to pick a different profession. Now I need to utilize this for my self coaching. So one of the things that I always taught my clients was to start asking them the serious, raw question of what do I want? And if I had every resource available to me, what would I be doing?

[00:15:26] Where would I be? And I'm talking every resource. If you had money in the bank, if you had whatever job title fulfills you, if you had the dream partner, if you were living in the dream home, whatever it is. If you can sit with the vision of your desired dream reality as big as it can be. Where are you? Who are you with and what are you doing?

[00:15:52] And so I started asking myself the question that I coached so much to my clients. And I realized, although I had spent 17 years building up a beautiful, successful business, I had showed up every single day. I've never missed my for my clients. I grind. I built a business two years into COVID. Like I had only owned, I owned a huge commercial salon.

[00:16:21] And then two years into it, COVID happened. And, and then I thrived, dude, I thrived. And I built a business over a decade of a brick and mortar bills business outside of being a hairstylist for 17 years. And I grinded and I grinded. And then when I sat with the question of who are you and what are you doing? If you have every resource available to you.

[00:16:49] And it wasn't what I was doing, even though I had built it, even though I had. And I realized I built a lot of this based upon survival. Yes. I built a lot of this based upon fear and patterns. I wanted to be approved so much at a young age. I sought validation through success and achievement. I grew up. I'm the girl that wakes up at 3 a.m.

[00:17:18] and works out for two hours, makes all of her meals, goes to work for 14 hours. Everybody glows towards her and she goes home and crashes. And no one ever got to see that.

[00:17:33] And so when I asked myself the question, I realized, oh my God, even though I've created this beautiful life, this empire, this on the outside looking in perfect life, it's not actually aligned to my soul's mission. It's not. And, and, and I realized it's okay. And that's what I was saying. I started to resent that life. Yeah.

[00:18:01] I started, I started to show up and be like, I don't want to do this anymore. It's neat till it's not. It's fun till it's not. Now. I like how you're bringing up a lot of this because this could have gone so many different ways. I've known many friends who basically slaved away at a job just because their parents told them, but their parents never once asked, what do you actually want to do junior? Which was, it's like, well, I don't know.

[00:18:26] And would you say even just with academics, it's got still gotten kind of flawed because I've gone to so many different high schools and colleges and without fail, the advisors wanted to be the advisor of the year, but very little. So what do you want to do with your career? And didn't really answer or give a solution to the, I don't know, or I have an idea, but I don't know how to get there. So, or I'd have to go to a different college altogether because that's not offered here. So how did you just kind of stop all the different venting? Would you say?

[00:18:57] Okay. Cause you did. When I say that I had to build my identity on survival, I meant it. My parent, my mom kicked me out when I was 18. All my friends went off to college and I went to hair school, but I immediately after my mom kicked me out at 18, I got a good job. I was always really good at getting a good job. So while all my friends went off to college, I hustled.

[00:19:27] I learned the art of hustling very young. I was managing retail stores. I was working as an assistant under powerful men, all while going to hair school and working two jobs. I had to, to survive. And I quickly realized the harshness of the real world at a young age. And so I had to develop all of these patterns of forceful nature.

[00:19:54] And so every part of my routines and rituals that I established were actually threaded on this idea of perfection and performance. Yes. To the point where I actually completely exhausted all of my own inner wisdom and crashed and started outsourcing all of my power because I was making money.

[00:20:22] It's easy to get spoiled on money, but give yourself credit. Like, I'm sure you've known many, many of our peers do make the mistake. Once I'm out of college, I don't have to keep looking at books and learning history is like negative. You always got to be looking around. So I guess when you had to use the internet and just website promotions, I guess you did mention fear.

[00:20:50] You did mention, you know, just looking at the time, bills, personal health. How did you organize that? Would you say, if you want to do a Cliff Notes of Cliff Notes, how did you just say, OK, I'm going to focus on this this week and here's my deadline for this. And then I'm going to do this. Then I'm going to work on a few other things to my craft. And here's I'm going to utilize this.

[00:21:14] But because this is not easy, it is, but it isn't easy to work for yourself and then also, you know, get the amount of sleep you need to recoup. And. This is what I like to call my 3 a.m. method. OK, sweet. I don't believe in the excuse of there's not enough time in the day and I'm too tired. I don't believe in that.

[00:21:43] You make choices all day long that take away from your time and create a lack of energy. Bad choices. And so when you rewire those towards your purpose and passion, everything clicks. And so for me and you do not have to wake up at 3 a.m., but the concept. I'm a night owl, so I'm all open. No matter what time you do this at. But I my non-negotiable is every single day.

[00:22:13] You must spend minimum one hour on yourself, your self study. And I believe in three rituals in this one hour block that unlock everything for you, your creativity, your throat chakra to be able to communicate clearly throughout the day, your power centers for your self-worth. Everything opens and connects if you start your day like this.

[00:22:40] And so for me, because I worked 15, 17 hour days, I had to wake up every single day at 3 a.m. and do this and then leave my house and go to work. And everything revolved around this ritual because it was the most important part of my day.

[00:22:59] So if anything pulled away from that, like an invite somewhere, a temptation to do something else, but it pulled away from me being able to wake up at 3 a.m., it was a no for my entire life. And so this is what I did. Every day, 3 a.m., wake up, immediately go into meditation. Immediately. I don't even empty my bladder, dude.

[00:23:26] Immediately go into meditation because we've got theta brainwaves going on. Spend 20 minutes visualizing your dream day, moment, week, year, whatever you're trying to build in yourself, whether it's self-esteem, whether it's confidence, whether it's a business, whatever you're trying to build, picture it.

[00:23:51] Picture it at the best time, like not the worst case scenario, the best case scenario. And visualize that before your feet ever exit your bed. Then exercise. Move your body. Move. Stretch. Move it out. Then you have to write 500 words in a journal.

[00:24:19] It's three full big pages. I love it. What this does is it removes all of the bullshit that's been lingering in you from the previous day, previous week, whatever. And it clears up space for whatever's supposed to come that day. Inner guidance, messages from your ancestors, just clearing the energetic blocks, essentially.

[00:24:45] Those are my three non-negotiables done at 3 a.m. And I have practiced this every single day for 12 and a half years. I will definitely take the third option. You know, I do do a lot of meditation before sleeping. It has made a difference, but I do need to use more of the diaries. Usually I'll make notes and a to-do list, but I really do need to make it personal. It's like, here's the thing that's built up to angst.

[00:25:13] There's something magical about forcing your brain to remove 500 words. It's not easy. And you'll find that you'll just start rambling to get it done, and that's okay. That's okay. It's kind of like a blueprint in a way. Like, okay, we'll perfect this. You know, like, I want to do cooking. I want to do a fun activity. I want to host a gallery event.

[00:25:41] Well, that's not going to happen overnight, so how about I get all the annoyances that are inevitably going to happen in the road just before that planning and get this out of the way so that doesn't become an argument or an issue. And like you say, the raw energy is making place for more of the positive healing energy. It's so weird, like you say, to describe it to others because so many want to just get all distracted by the fancy words. It's like, stop, listen.

[00:26:10] Yeah, it just and like you say, it's like we do without fail come up against a BS excuse where it's like, no, but that there is an excuse for that. That doesn't need to even be an excuse there because you can choose what you want to do with your time. You can I was finding that I was going to a gym, but there was very little accomplishment that was coming from there.

[00:26:36] And so then when I started looking at the finances and the time behind it and seeing what a difference it made in my sleep, I said, OK, let me try this other exercise from home method that's working better instead of just getting all caught up in the other mayhem I don't need. And. Which is, you know, going through rush hour traffic and dealing with annoying people who won't share a running or swimming lane. So it's like it. How would you say?

[00:27:03] Have you always just kind of had your deflector shields for lack of a geeky method where you're just like, I'm going to just cancel everything negative out today? Right. And because, like you say, many seem to think, oh, I'll just do this and it'll be better. It's like you've got to experiment with this. You've got to try a different way to vent for lack of better description. And it's also annoying having. I think I get.

[00:27:32] Did you ever do any other mental therapy? I found that so many of them, especially with their assertive communication, they have it down in that the small things build up to the bigger annoying things that then cause you to just kind of lose it and say, why am I angry now over something so small? Because I didn't talk about it. Have you ever had to kind of remind yourself is like, I need to talk about this with someone. And if it can't be with a loved one, clearly, then it's got to be just some other coworker

[00:28:01] who's got my back. Truthfully, I spent a lot of years having a soundboard because of my career. I could bounce off how I was feeling or ideas that I was having with another woman. And while I was doing their hair and get real feedback from someone that would be similar to like a mother to me.

[00:28:27] But what I found was over time, what happened was I lost my own concept of what was best for me. And so my practices are actually in learning how to hear your own what's good for you. And so you hearing through your nervous system that going to this gym isn't really serving you,

[00:28:54] but you can practice moving your body at home and find it to be not only more financially beneficial, but also you are seeing more results that way. Why wouldn't you do that? Right. And so I think that a lot of people keep trying to find this trend or this thing that they can search. And in reality, it's in you.

[00:29:22] And so you just proved that by saying your nervous system was giving you a signal that this gym wasn't really the best for you. Most of us have learned how to silence the voice of our nervous system. And so we don't know what exercises or foods or time to tap out. What is good for them? I was finding it was giving me the reverse stress and anxiety.

[00:29:49] And I'm sorry to make this about me, but basically it was just one of those. It's like I'm getting so clogged up in. Oh, I got to be here at this time because this gym closes by that time. It's like, you know, I but then finding out the exercise actually wasn't making a difference in sleep. It was like, OK, but let me try this different exercise. OK, that's way better. And that doesn't even require going anywhere. So I find other ways to make up for the social interaction, but it's not during while I'm working out.

[00:30:17] There's all these annoyances in terms of closed down, you know, highways and other stuff that. I don't need to add five other infuriating things to the plate. And at the same time, handling that anger and annoyance, that's a whole other thing. I'm not one who explodes mentally, but I am still it's just kind of building up like like I always look at that like that's a signal from your nervous system.

[00:30:42] If you're getting the pattern of a reaction from your reality, whether it's like getting in the car to go to the gym and every time you do that, something comes like I call them phenomenons from the exterior world that makes the experience that you're trying to have feel like resistance. That is a sign from the universe, from your nervous system that it's not in alignment. And it's it's us that keep trying.

[00:31:12] Like, I'm no, I said I was going to go to the gym and I paid this membership. I'm going to go. Somebody told me I should go. So I'm going to go. No, they literally your body is trying to show you in many ways, phenomenons that it's not in alignment for you. And it's until you start to listen to the signals of your the game that's happening around you that you stop resisting the signs and you start to flow with it. And then you're like, well, wait a minute.

[00:31:41] I'm spending too much money and it's costing me too much energy to get here. It's actually frustrating me if I do something different. And then all of a sudden the floodgates open and the resistance is gone. And it's the more times we enter the world with this perspective of when I feel absolute resistance, frustration, anger, whatever anxiety.

[00:32:07] It's a signal from the universe, from your nervous system, from your body that wherever you are, you're not in alignment, but you're not going to die there. You just need to make a pivot and you'll get back on path. And let me just say this for the record. Men are wimps. And I know others are going to do the, oh, dear yet. But see, that's their insecurity talking.

[00:32:31] And I was finding here, you know, early years in my 30s, it's like, whoa, I'm afraid to fail. Well, I've only done it all my life. Why now? So it's kind of funny how it just that builds up as another resistance. Oh, I don't want to fail. Well, how do you get good? You might have to waste $400 on yard care or house renovation or anything. Car insurance.

[00:33:01] But the boring everyday stuff that makes your world better to get to a better place. And so it's so funny, though, how many like to just take the failure and that's it. They don't learn from the failure. And. You had so many inspiring Instagram stories. You have it down to a T. You shared a wonderful. Well, it wasn't wonderful. I just but I felt it is like why I gave up drinking almost cost me a life.

[00:33:30] You had so many other barriers in the world. And like you say, this is making a diary, making a personal thing, sharing a personal story. I I need to. And I think that's just it. We are. So many of our peers are distracted by social media. They don't like to use it for the positive thing because it's easier to sell negativity like clickbait articles or look at this famous person. We follow and how they failed idiot. It's like, well, hold on a second.

[00:33:56] That's doing that really ultimately does not do anyone any good, even if you're doing that for a website that pays you to spew that nonsense. So I think you have really helmed it in that, you know, every minute matters. Every second counts. But. Why do you think you organize. Your material so well, even before going into all your different practices?

[00:34:23] Well, why do you have that kind of invisible kind of pin drop where you are already a living human calendar, if you will, where you're able to set all these goals and then keep. Talking it out, whether with yourself or another person, but why do you think you're able to keep going? Really? I'm sorry if I'm. Going on and on. Just know you're good.

[00:34:50] I think for me, I have a relentless pursuit to evolve. And like I said, I never got married and I never had children. I made very strong decisions at very young ages that my path was going to face some challenges in order for me to evolve in a beautiful way that I can now share with people.

[00:35:17] And so I chose not to give birth or life to people, but I give light and love and hope to an entire generation of humans right now. And so developing content and my message and my brand is the motivation to keep me going.

[00:35:38] Because I know that I, whether you hit the like button for me, because some of my concepts are extremely triggering and vulnerable. I know I'm being seen right now. And my job is to allow people to see themselves through me.

[00:35:58] And I know that my uncomfortable human experiences are just a layer that I can expose so that people can truly feel safe. Because if I can't. Because if I can spew that much of my air, that much of my life in such an open way, then everybody can. And everybody can feel their way through their experience rather than silence it, numb it, distract it.

[00:36:27] And so every part of my day, my night, every waking moment of my existence is attached to my evolution, to building that dream reality that I can picture and I can feel. And so there is no taking a break. There is no, what else would I do? I don't own a TV. I don't have like children.

[00:36:57] I live two and a half miles down a dead end road, 45 minutes up a cliff on a mountain. I have no neighbors. I'm 45 minutes from a town. And so every waking moment is mine, dedicated to building my message, my purpose,

[00:37:16] just so that other humans can feel seen and validated that another human has experienced a lot of their experiences and has learned their way through it. And now I'm here to guide you to the other side of your identity. Removing the old versions of you, the past, the programming, and allowing you to be supported in your journey towards your dream reality.

[00:37:44] Whether that's to just be more confident or have a certain look to your body or to heal addictions and programming that's been patterned inside of you since before you were old enough to even understand it. So my job has so many layers that keep me in a constant state of studying. What else would I do?

[00:38:10] There is nothing else that excites me more than being in nature and helping humans see themselves through love and light. That's it. Oh, see, and that's a mouthful, but that's really a delight. You're not waiting for a TV to get in your way. I've cut some stuff out, but truth be told, I need to cut out so many other things because, like you say, it adds up.

[00:38:39] And there's so many people who spend time just kind of being waiting to exist, for lack of a better word. They're just kind of. They ask their neighbor, you want to go out, you know, dine at this one fancy restaurant, which we can't afford to eat at or something, or they get their hopes up. And and so even going back to when you talked about making goals is like a lot of people go, we'll do the whole. Oh, well, it's impossible. So I don't want to reflect on it. It's like there are so many possibilities.

[00:39:09] If you think that's too if you're not comfortable going that avenue, you don't have to dedicate time to it. But like you say, just planning out and. Giving emotion to other people is like. Someone's going to have something to say when you are gone, you know, as I've been in awkward scenarios and I'm being real with you, the realist. Where I was at a funeral and it's like, I sadly don't know this person. They were nice, but I literally didn't know them other than that.

[00:39:39] They played on their iPhone all day. It's just kind of sad. I don't. And I don't want to make that. That they're a lesser person or anything. It was like they didn't. We didn't show our personal sides to each other, so it was just kind of like, yeah, and I don't want to be that guy ever. Where someone's struggling to come up on the at the funeral. Passage, well, I don't have anything to say about this person. I didn't know him either.

[00:40:10] So I think like you say, it is wild how many of us still don't want to be real with each other. And it's like, well, OK, so if you don't want to be real with that person, you can be real with so many other individuals. You don't have to just be the two grunts who go in at the nine to five job. You don't have to be just the person who's always at. You know, the grocery store buying out, you know, this one particular product is like you can be.

[00:40:38] You can keep setting goals. You can keep doing all kinds of things. Why do you think so many when they do self-help? They mistake that as, oh, well, I'm being selfish. It's like, well, but you still have to work on you yourself before you can help others. Just don't stay there too long and don't stop mastering or trying out different things. Because, yeah, I don't mean to sound like negative at all when I say this, but this is a harsh reality.

[00:41:07] Even the people that love you the most, that are your closest family members, partners, they're out for their own experience too. Yes. And so if you can remind yourself when you're choosing to not give yourself time, effort, energy, whatever it looks like for you, because you feel guilty over giving to yourself, over someone else,

[00:41:37] remind yourself real quick that whoever that other person is, I promise, has their best intention in mind. And it's us that wire ourselves to feel guilt and shame for doing something that we are actually worthy of doing. And so it's actually a solar plexus imbalance when we don't feel worthy of spending energy on ourselves.

[00:42:04] And so we always have to go deeper. Why don't you feel good enough to splurge time, money, energy, whatever, on you? Yes. Why? Go deeper. Because that's not the problem. The problem is you don't feel good enough to do that. And you got to sit with that. That's perfect.

[00:42:30] That's perfectly said because facing the music. You have to get extremely honest with yourself. Like I hate to say like F everybody else, but you have to have a little bit – When you're trying to rewire programs and you realize like I'm not content with my life anymore. I'm not satisfied. I don't – I have too many years left to just exist like this.

[00:42:58] And not everybody gets here. Like you said, some people just float all their lives and they're okay with mediocrity and those people can stay there. That's fine. Right. Don't share it though. That's fine. Yeah. That's fine. But for the ones that all of a sudden reach an age, a point, an event in their life where they're no longer comfortable in their human experience. Like there has to be more.

[00:43:26] I know that I'm destined for more greatness. Those people need to get extremely honest with themselves. Not the external world. Not what you think people want you to do. No sleeping it off. Yeah. Not how other people are comfortable viewing you. You have to start being comfortable with pressing against your own edges of your comfort zone. Oh, and that's just it.

[00:43:56] I think that's the other thing too. We've kind of gone back and forth on it. But also like you don't know if something's going to make you uncomfortable until you try it. It's like, hey, I'm not sure I want to try out that nutrition. Well, I don't know until I try this kind of protein bar or I try this kind of different workout that I got to see. Like you say, I got to do a test run and then I can quit the trial run. But don't just say no blindly and then find other things that are based off previous experiences.

[00:44:25] Like, well, I tried five different variations on that. I'm not comfortable with trying another variation on this. I should try something else. Because it's wild how we kind of have an invisible checklist. It's like, done that. How about we try this instead? Most people are so willing to try something new instead of looking at what they're already doing. And so that's kind of my job where they're like, well, should I add in X, Y, or Z into my diet?

[00:44:53] Should I buy this supplement, right? They want to introduce something new to try to receive a benefit. Without actually viewing what their current reality looks like. The patterns that they show up for every single day that are ingrained so deeply that are causing them to not be able to lose weight. Not be able to sleep. Not be able to breathe properly. Whatever it is that your signs and symptoms are.

[00:45:22] You're getting signals from your body. But they want to buy something to fix it. But so my job is to say, well, have you looked at your – if you can't sleep, have you looked at your caffeine? Like that's a no-brainer, right? The other things you can cross off that are all in front of you. It's the elephant in the room. What are you doing every day that now you've trained your body to either build up a resistance to or now that's the reality that you're living in.

[00:45:52] Right. And you're somewhere in the middle and you're uncomfortable. And so instead of trying to add in all these new techniques, look at what you're already doing and start pulling things out that aren't in alignment with the version of you that you visualized that has it all. What do they do? Do they wake up in the morning and doom scroll for two hours? Yeah. Get that up. Please. Do they do that? Probably not.

[00:46:21] Do they like go through the McDonald's drive-thru for breakfast? Do they wake up like extremely irritated or anxious and then make awful food choices all day? Yeah. Like they don't do any of those things. And so it's about figuring out where you want to be versus where you currently are and how far away are you?

[00:46:43] Go beyond what you've already tried and look at as like what's your ultimate goal and can any of these steps help you get in that direction? What is your dream version of you doing that you're not? Perfect. And where can you start to implement those changes to show up as the higher you, the more evolved you?

[00:47:07] And the more you do that, you reprogram not only your patterns, your identity, but you step into your higher version of you constantly evolving. And when you get on this roller coaster ride of evolution, that's what makes you never want to stop. I like now I've seen too much. I know too much to go back and revert to awful patterns. Yeah.

[00:47:35] I know how good it feels to feel really good and aligned. I would never. It's I might as well like, no, it's not. It's not an option. Yeah, it's not an option. That's great, too. It's like looking at just other factors. It's like it's it's kind of the elephant in the room. This is right in front of me. This kind of food I know for a fact makes me allergic. So, you know, bye bye.

[00:48:02] It's to go in the trash to avoid, you know, any temptation. But then, like you say, then still doing the journal every day. It's like, can I get a step closer here? Because that's what matters. And I got to make it matter. How would you say you separate all the inspiring stories, too? Because. You know, it's got to be like you say, you got to share a moment of your time. You got to layer it. And.

[00:48:30] Did you always consider yourself a natural storyteller? I think you have to be when you do hair. Sure. I mean, no, that's great, because there's plenty of. My father does marketing and he's had his fair share of a client who has a cool vision, but doesn't know how to tell their story without make be over wording it. And my mother used to be a journalist, so I've always had that kind of ingrained in me is like, stop after two sentences. I've lost them. You know, so how do you think you kind of maintain attention?

[00:49:00] Like get everyone focused. Well, I accidentally used too much woo-woo words, so I'm actually working on that. I'm a little out in left field sometimes, but I've actually spent so much of my career not having to build trust. You're already trusting me with chemicals at your head and scissors around your ear. And your most vulnerable stories.

[00:49:26] And so for me to try to build trust now with a community of strangers online has been different to navigate. I'm not going to lie. Because there are so many layers of my story. There are so many identities of me. I could, and I learned from hairdressing how to become a chameleon.

[00:49:49] I wasn't the same stuff to an 80-year-old woman as I was to some 17-year-old high school girl, right? Like they got two different hairstylist versions. Well, and you have a natural heart. So even if you, God forbid, I mean, it's inevitable. You had a client who was insecure and is like, why are you asking me that? But you could diffuse that negative energy in the room. It's like, okay, you're going to be a jerk. We don't have to talk. How would you like your, you know?

[00:50:19] Well, I got really good at feeling people from touching them my whole career. And so I knew immediately if you loved your hair, if you were happy with your husband that day, if your kid yelled at you on the school bus ride. Like I knew everything because my job was to feel you and give you an experience and get you back into your world as fast as possible.

[00:50:43] And so like my job became navigating how people's energy was. And that became consuming. I'm not going to lie. I had to learn how to protect. You can kind of feel it. And then there's other times where it's like, well, I only know if I go up and talk to this person, you know, why they're giving me a very stink eye. You know, like why they're just, obviously I can't approach them. They have given me the awful look, but I don't know why, but maybe it's not me. Maybe it's just in that direction.

[00:51:13] They just got something on their mind. I don't know. I think that's the beauty of being a hairstylist is I was basically wearing this invisible super cloak all the time that protected me from people's sharpness actually being geared towards me. And so I couldn't, I could feel it. I could feel you before you got out of the car. I'd be like, oh, she rushed in. She was late to Pilates. She dropped her smoothie on her lap.

[00:51:42] Oh no, her dog ran away this morning. She knows what she wants, but she doesn't know how to say it. I would know all of that before you walked in the door and I would be like, I'm going to go get her favorite coffee. I'm going to go put on her favorite song. I'm going to go, like, we're going to make this fun. I mean, dude, we had karaoke machines in my salon. Oh, that's fortunate. My salon was called Good Vibes Salon.

[00:52:07] And that's every day was about creating a good environment for humans. I know that's not your main focus anymore, but if you know any others who are trying to get into their own hair and makeup business and they unfortunately don't have that deal, the owner already has a preset music playlist or deal. How would you recommend they kind of make this salon kind of bigger than usual?

[00:52:35] If I could give anybody advice in their career at all that has to work or interact with other people, it's to always try to see it from a lens of compassion. That every single day, every second is different for each person. And when you're providing them with a service, even if it's just a smile, there's a transaction of energy occurring.

[00:53:00] And if we can have more awareness as an individual and then collectively expand on just being more compassionate with every human experience that you have, that if somebody feels off or icky in their energy or angry or sharp, that it's not you. It's something that they're holding. And I learned how much people really hold and you don't know what they're going through.

[00:53:31] And you'd be surprised at how much the average human right now is experiencing physically, spiritually, financially, energetically. There's a lot of weight on the collective right now. And so every interaction you have with another human is an opportunity for you to be as compassionate towards them as if you were speaking to the inner child in you.

[00:54:01] We'll return after these messages.

[00:54:33] We'll be right back. We'll be right back.

[00:55:13] We'll be right back.

[00:56:04] We'll be right back. Not true, Ray. In the past, we've discussed such matches as Captain America versus Darth Vader, Solid Snake versus the Iron Giant, classic matchups like Robocop versus Terminator, and even the Muppets versus Sesame Street. That one was crazy. So if you're a fan of geek culture and love a spirited debate, check out the Who Would Win Show wherever you get your podcasts or check us out at whowouldwinshow.com.

[00:57:03] You would never talk down to the little you, right? What kind of energetic attack we're all under right now. Time to process, yeah. If you can see another human from the lens of love and let them feel seen, valued, heard, just all the yummy stuff in a two-second to 20-minute interaction, whatever it looks like,

[00:57:26] and then you accumulate that all day, all day, all week, you are a literal beam of light. And then you have no excuse to walk around feeling resentment, anger, because your mission is to expose the good in the world.

[00:57:46] And if collectively we get a bunch of people on board with just being at a high frequency, then our mental health, our overweight, all of those are just a symptom of us being misaligned. And wounded children walking around in adult bodies. No, that's great, because I used to know a bunch of people in a comedy improv class who were all, you'll love this, realtors.

[00:58:15] So they wanted the actor side of things. I think some of them had become truthful with themselves, but I know for a fact some of them just kept the act going and didn't really have any compassion other than, well, the check cleared. You know, so like you say, it's like the compassion is just such an underrated tool to have. It's like, I'm going to be real with the customer. I'm not going to.

[00:58:39] If they're not letting me in, I can still, you know, keep the door open without wasting too much time on someone who just doesn't, you know, it's not personal, but they do not want to let anyone in. And they're just not ready at that point. But I can tease, I can say, well, if you do want to talk while you're here. I am here, you know, I'm available, but I like how you're kind of putting your foot down also. And it's like, but never stop being human.

[00:59:07] You know, there's having this. Very just authentic persona. And. I think I do encounter this with some salespeople who unfortunately is like, OK, now you're selling me. You're not meaning to, but you're doing it too well to where now you're being false. I need to be truthful for a minute. You know, you're not on the clock. And. You're more likely to make a sell if it is pretty legit.

[00:59:35] So it but in this case, you know, with the hair salon, it's like, yeah, it's like everyone wants to be here because they want to. Resculpt themselves, they want to. You know, do everything, nails, better skin care, everything, and. I it's just so unique that this has transformed you and to your current project and then just that kind of filled the emptiness,

[01:00:04] the abyss that you went through when you had no one else to lean on to. That's so cool that it was kind of a. A double win, if you will. But yeah, I mean, compassion. How can it not be a thing? You know, it's like it just like if you say the words, but they don't actually mean anything. Then say it in a way where it does have meaning. You know, it's just it's a trial and error run.

[01:00:33] And I just think that's unique that. You're passing this on because. It's easy for many to just go through life and then forget to be real with themselves after a while, because they, again, didn't make the time. Personally and for others. So where does. Where do you put up the doorstop? Where do you say. Now on to the next challenge.

[01:01:00] So realizing from here that I could I could make you feel beautiful, I could make you feel seen and valued, but it only lasted six weeks. It's right. Your grays come back. And I realized that I wanted to be able to provide like a forever transformation for somebody. And it was my my journey of my experiences of just relentless suffering there for a while.

[01:01:30] I realized that I've learned how to bridge the gap for others. And so now moving forward, everything is really just aligning to magnetizing in the people that need my message, that need to be supported in their transformation. And I'm actually.

[01:01:54] I'm actually kind of struggling with the exact human because there are so many layers. And so for me to be a salesperson and speak to one avatar and provide one solution. Every time I coach someone, there's so many layers to what comes out and exposed to provide that healing experience.

[01:02:23] That my mission now is to find exactly who needs support, genuine support and is open to perceiving a different view. Probably from anything you've ever landed on before.

[01:02:39] And if you've tried it all and now you're ready to stop outsourcing and start turning inward and learn how to drive this Ferrari that you've been given essentially. Because we are the most advanced technology on earth. And so my job now is to just support people in giving them the instruction manual for the first time.

[01:03:07] If you drive the vehicle like this, I promise you will deliver it in mint condition on the other side. That's so well said. But like you say, it's like, I don't, we don't even have to even package ourselves as a product after a while. But we do have to find a way to just like, okay. We're at level five. Let's go to level seven.

[01:03:34] If you want to continue, if you want to try this, you know, so many different. Yeah. So I try to tell my clients that ultimately your transformation is up to you. And so if you're going to be mad or sad or anything at the end, that's on you. But if you're going to be completely transformed, give me 90 days of like a relentless pursuit to this and follow the protocol. And so you end up on my app.

[01:04:03] I get full access to your phone, your calendar. I can make your phone go off whenever I want with whatever I want. And so I start to rewire your rituals, your patterns, your beliefs through mindful techniques, breath work, nervous system regulation, exercise, nutrition. There are layers to what each person individually needs.

[01:04:26] And so I basically dial it up or down in certain categories to provide you with that dream life. Right? So you tell me where you want to be and where you are now, and I walk you to the other side. And so I have to really learn you and feel through your energy field as far as what is actually sustainable for you.

[01:04:54] What are the patterns that we actually need to break first before we can implement change? And so my job is to kind of become your best friend a little bit and start to pick you apart. And then I start to rewire your calendar, the structure of a 24-hour period for you. And together we work through something that's sustainable, that's going to provide you with the result of that dream life.

[01:05:23] And so it can be as little, as label as you want to call it of like, I just want more self-esteem. Right? Well, we're going to figure out why you don't have self-esteem, where that came from. We're not going to spend a lot of time there in the past. I'm going to drag you into the future and let you surrender whatever structure or belief pattern that you've attached your worthiness to.

[01:05:50] And then a symptom of having more confidence or working on your solar plexus is a better body or a partner or your dream job. Like that stuff just kind of comes naturally once we start to do this work and you start to embody the dream version of you. Can I just say I admire that you value your time, you value the client's time.

[01:06:17] That is so smart that you decided, okay, calendar, let me see it. We'll make this work. I don't want to see you if you've just gone back from five different meetings. I mean, we can make that work, but only if you're realistic about it. You know, like something's got to go. There's a dent in the road. You won't be able to make it to my class, which is a problem because you just committed to this. So that's also neat, though, that you did bring up the past. That's the other thing, too. When reflecting on the past. Don't get stuck there.

[01:06:47] Exactly. It's like, okay, don't get stuck there. Yeah. And the only way to revisit it is a beautiful memory or something I want to change and say, I don't want to make that mistake again. What did I learn from that negative past? But most it's so easy for them to just be. It's like a sinking ship. Oh, the anchor went down. I'm sinking. It's like, well, now you're real.

[01:07:10] You might as well be back there in like, I don't know, 2004, 2015 when that awful incident happened. So you're reliving it a second time. That's got to be even more traumatic. And if you don't learn anything from it this time, that's. It's like you're having to do triple the work now. It's like some that's cool. Every time you go back into your memories, your nervous system doesn't know the difference between a memory and right now. No. So you're putting your body through the same experience.

[01:07:38] And it's good to bring the awareness to X event occurred. That's why A, B and C are happening now. Like it's cool to bridge the gap of why. Right. Once the awareness is there, move on from it. Forgive it. Forget it. Whatever you got to do. And I don't mean to spiritually bypass people, but it's the future you. It's the desired reality. It's the goal.

[01:08:08] It's the result size. It's the after picture that's going to get you to bridge the gap. Otherwise, you just stay in the past. And when we stay in the past, we end up frustrated, angry, have anxiety. Yes. Then we end up with the insomnia, the heart palpitations, the headache, and we spiral.

[01:08:31] And the Western medical world has no idea how to see this as an energetic experience, a misalignment attached to a pattern or program that was developed decades ago at this point. Yes. Yes. And so now it's just up to you to go, oh, I've driven down this same road in my mind so many damn times that I've created tire marks in my brain. It really is. All these. All these.

[01:09:01] Literally easier for my thoughts to travel down this road because it's familiar than to go down this new street in the dark where I can't see it. So we just keep going down the same road. But in reality, like we just need to make a U-turn, recognize we've been there before and move towards the future. I must say your way with words is just, again, it's not only natural, but you never stayed at the same time.

[01:09:31] It's so easy to kind of sound like a broken record and just stating it different ways to where finally the light bulb goes off in people's craniums. That's a gift. And have you ever thought of doing some public speaking events for those who are interested? I would love to. But I also I'm glad you use the tire parallel is like, yeah, it's like. If this car is not working, don't drive on it.

[01:10:00] If you've gone down that same road, which has dents, what why what different? You know, this is no better than a dog hitting an electric fence. You must learn eventually. That's if you if you break up with your girlfriend, you're not going to drive down her street. No, you're going to avoid it for a little bit, even if it means you have to take the longer way home. You personalized it. Yeah. You're not going to be like, oh, I'm driving by her work just because it's my route home.

[01:10:28] You're literally going to go a different way to avoid that discomfort. Why would you continue to drive down the road right towards your pain? Yeah. Why? There's no point. That's like self-loathing at that point. That's why we just like we just like to make things more uncomfortable sometimes. Totally. Honestly, I've been blessed to have family on different religions and different sides of

[01:10:56] the political aisle who always will see each other every annual year. But there were a few who were not on speaking terms. And so we were like, OK, we've got to be strategic that ex in law can't be at the same party as that person. But you also know this isn't a me thing. I've sent the invite. Both are welcome. They decided, hey, I will never make that work. So how do you rejections? Not the right word. How do you know when someone has given you?

[01:11:24] I refuse to share this incident. Or other personal matter. And so because they just don't trust anyone with the story or fixing this solution in their life, when do you just kind of politely say is like, OK, well, it's up to you if you want to be more truthful with yourself. But remember, this is for you. You know, I'm the friend. I'm also the teacher. Refusing to share is kind of the first big no-no.

[01:11:53] It's like, I guess when somebody refuses to share, it has nothing to do with you. It's a reflection of how they'll be perceived or interpreted in their sharing. And that has nothing to do with the sharer, the sherry. It doesn't.

[01:12:13] And I've only ever encountered women that resisted opening up to me because they were in that exact moment. They were experiencing extreme pain that they were hiding, that they did not want to expose.

[01:12:34] And in the question that I asked or the look that I gave them, they felt like they were going to crack if they open their mouth at all. And so they had to put up a brick wall around every aspect of them in order to preserve the suffering that they were experiencing.

[01:12:58] And so typically it would take me about 15 minutes, maybe tops. This is like they decided to break through that. Yeah. And it's usually not in prying or asking or shining the light in there. It was more about like I would feel into like, oh, I could tell her about this like awful thing that happened to me yesterday.

[01:13:26] And it doesn't have to be where like misery loves company. Right. No. And now we're both going into negativity. It was more of just like, well, let me tell her something really bad that happened to me, but I'm going to try and make it funny. And I'm going to use some like good energy in it. And then she would warm up and she would, it would always happen at the shampoo bowl. She'd be like, girl, my husband just died.

[01:13:50] You know, like it would be like the worst thing that you could imagine that this human is trying to hold in. And, and here you are like, why didn't you show up for dinner last week? You haven't talked to me. And you're interpreting their energy as something totally different from what they're actually doing. I did something wrong. It's like, no, they're dealing with something else. That's why they flicked out. Yeah. Like her husband just died, you know?

[01:14:19] And so I always had to be very careful when letting somebody open up when they were coming in with resistance. Because I have had that happen several times where she sat down and said, my husband died yesterday. And I'm like, you made it to your hair appointment? And you still went out that same week. And they're like, well, I wasn't going to miss my appointment with you.

[01:14:48] But, but it was that they needed that 30, 45 minute positive energy to then unlock the negative. Yes. Again, reclaim your rhythm, rediscover your power as Wild Moon Oasis says. But again, why do you think so many also get therapy mixed up with? Well, I'll just talk smack and vent with friends after work. We'll get drunk.

[01:15:14] I'm like, that doesn't solve it because you're bringing their negative energy you've experienced unleashing it on those people to where then they're like, hey, Billy, can you ask Lisa and Tom to not come here after work, you know, for once? Because I can't take any more of that negative story. They keep sharing that because a lot of those stories are annoying in that they don't want a solution to the problem. They just want to, you know, get hammered and have a lot to eat and then, you know, fall over on the couch at two in the morning.

[01:15:44] Then everyone's angry. It's annoying to have, but, but necessary to have to remind everyone. It's like, if you're going to share this negative energy, what, what solution do you want? And if you still at the end of this want to do the whole, well, I, I refuse to find a solution to that. I'm just going to drink it off. I was like, whoa, you're wasting time. You could have so much happiness unlocked instead of just, well, just quit my job. I was like, well, that don't solve it.

[01:16:11] There's more to it than just, I got a bad boss or I'm learning the small things. It's like reminding others to just find the other insecurities that have built up. It was like, well, I never did talk to my stepdad who I hate. Well, maybe why don't we figure that out? That might be a goal. Well, I need to be more honest with my boss about what's happening and maybe they'll stop being a hard ass. You know, it's or maybe my partner is just doing this one thing and I need to just read the right act one more time.

[01:16:41] Hey, please stop doing this. I'm not getting any sleep. And so I'm coming home being a grump and the relationships floutering. It's it's so wild how just a little small thing that builds up to the big thing and then having to remind those who want to listen. And hey, that's right. The problem is right in front of you. You can make this again. Oh, let's just have a sexy existence and ignore the negative. It's like, well, the negatives don't have to exist, period.

[01:17:10] You know, there's always going to be negativity. That's not what we're saying is like we're just saying fix the ones that are always festering, building up. And it's so it's a necessary annoyance to to tell others, well, you're adding other description onto this and that. What does this word mean to you? Because you are getting stopped by that one word. It's kind of like when you're telling people who I don't understand being woke.

[01:17:37] Well, maybe you should look up the word first instead of the politicized version of the word. It just means, you know, being pure, being nice, you know, being spiritual. And it is also a good lesson in just getting rid of the nasty friend. The block button on social media is my friend. I use it probably once a day that I got no time for it. And if someone wants to say, hey, I want to work on this project with you, this other person I blocked.

[01:18:06] I'm just say, OK, come back to me when you when you want to work with just me. You know, it's just like it's so funny how there's all these other sidestepping corners and. And I'm I'm sure you use a lot of assertive communication. Isn't that like the ultimate compromise is like the beauty of it is if the compromise still doesn't work, neither side can say, well, so and so was arrogant or stuck up or.

[01:18:32] Or refuse to, you know, hear me out is like or they labeled me as a flake is like, no, they heard it each one. And then they decided, well, I'll readjust this partnership. But if stuff has a friend who's like, hey, can can you be one of the bridesmaids at my wedding? And you're like, I'm not going to be in town that week. How about I, you know, babysit your kid? You know, I can make time for that. You know, it's like that was a compromise.

[01:18:59] It's like instead of just it's this my way or the highway or this way or on and only this way. I've had to do that with a few friends this time. It's like, well, I can't watch your kid, but I will walk your dog and mow your lawn. How about that? You know, just like it's finding a sideways or I can drive you to work from home or whatever.

[01:19:21] And it's just some side helping that even the most minor thing is going to make a big difference instead of just I refuse to only do this. You know, it's you have said more than several just. Impactful ways to just kind of look at this instead of just leading back to the whole. Well, well, I don't know what it is and I don't feel comfortable, so I won't hear it out. You know, it's just it's like we have all this brain fog after a while without realizing we have it.

[01:19:50] It's like, well, I always have to talk to someone when I've heard five other people give them a helpful thing and have to let them know, you know. Most people make the mistake of now I'm going to label you as sourpuss. I'm going to just say, here's the thing. I've heard five helpful things. And you're getting caught up not wanting to hear any helpful stuff, so we got to work on that.

[01:20:19] It's because these helpful people, you know, it's kind of like a bomb. There's a timer on it. You got like five more tries before they say, OK, well, you won't let me help you, period. So the helpful advice is going bye bye. You know, it's why burn that bridge? Why be the jerk in the corner who's self-loathing and like, oh, no one can help me. It's it's just like so many different factors.

[01:20:46] And then factoring in the so-called factors. What's the biggest dent in the road? Let's have there be zero loss of life. Let's have there be zero missed opportunities in time. This has been so extravagantly positive. And I can only imagine what one of your classes like. I'm going to put this on the radar to try out probably in the future. So Wild Moon Oasis. I really do like the site design and you offer, you know, mentorship, sobriety reset.

[01:21:15] And I like how you've just spilled that all out just at the very top. Like, what kind of transformation do you want? That's that's a four step process. That's that's great. How did workshopping that website go into play where you're like, here's what's going to be stressed and bold. Here's what's going to be a build up. Here's the promo image. And then anyone who wants to scroll, they'll scroll and they'll know exactly what, you know, is agreed upon in this course. Thank you.

[01:21:45] I actually built it and designed it myself to ensure that my words came straight from my own mouth. Like I said, when I was super successful in my career, I outsourced a lot of my power because I was so busy. I delegated. I had managers. I had people that worked under me and I did not make a lot of the choices in the business

[01:22:11] towards the end before I sold it because I was so maxed out. And I ended up hating like everything around me. Like I didn't even choose the flooring that I paid $15,000 for. I just was like somebody just pick it. Like I literally ran around like just telling other people how to make decisions for me. And I ended up misrepresented. I ended up misaligned.

[01:22:38] To just do it instead of spend time outlining it before agreeing upon. I was just so busy that I would just hire somebody to do something for me. And then I couldn't be mad when it wasn't exactly the way that I wanted it. Right. And so I knew moving forward that every single thing that I put out there is going to come from my heart and my hands. And so the message that you're reading in my website, anything that you see as far as content

[01:23:08] built for me is I've built, I've edited, I've done all of the outlining to just ensure that every part of it comes from my heart and my hands. Because you have value in your work and it is personal. So that's, again, that's a double win. That's nothing untruthful about that. You know, it's great. To be honest, I don't know any other human that's as qualified as me to talk, to speak

[01:23:34] on such topics in such intimate settings as my one-on-one coaching. And so like I know a lot of other coaches that have setters that live in other countries that do their replies for them. I don't do any of that. If you get a message from me, it's from me. If you schedule a call with me, you're getting on my calendar. And I've just made sure that moving forward, every ounce of my energy and soul is towards,

[01:24:03] I don't look at it like a business. I don't look at it like I look like I'm building a family. I'm building a community of humans that are not okay with settling for mediocrity in their life. And they want to rewire the structure, the box that they've put themselves in and expand into something bigger.

[01:24:28] And whatever that looks like for you, I'm here for it. And I'm the one to walk you to the other side of your patterns and programming because I have done it time and time and time again myself. And I've walked other humans through it over the last 17 years of working intimately with them. I've been coaching now for five.

[01:24:54] I just fully sold my business, moved 3000 miles away from home. I live where I know nobody. I changed my phone number. I have zero distraction and I have zero attachment to the old identity. And so moving forward, I'm ready to pull any other souls to the other side of their highest self. Oh, man.

[01:25:24] I feel blessed that you gave me a minute of your time, though, because it's like, you know, I never want to do an awful interview. When we did this show, we were just like, OK, we're pop culture, but we're going to have some personal stuff. It's not going to just be talking about all kinds of pop culture. And so being on a guest level is one thing. But like, man, like there's plenty of times where I have just as much in the moment questions as I do once written down. But the main thing is to never make it be just showy, you know, like staged and also

[01:25:54] untruthful. You know, it's like you don't want a question that will just be so average or half arsed. And it seems very unique that like you say, it's like you don't have to compare yourself to anyone else because you have your own template and book. And that's not throwing a big head or saying, you know, oh, I don't need to learn anymore. It's like I'm just making this. This is my course. This is not a variation on five other self-help authors.

[01:26:22] You know, this is when we go to Steph Hanna's Oasis site. This is Hannah's site like this isn't any other mentor who she has to co-endorse and share a stage with. I'm sure you'd be blessed to share a stage with someone. But it's like it's like this is my course. If you want to take from it, that that'd be an honor. You know, it's like but this isn't, you know, a variation on some other TED Talker. And this is not a dish on TED Talk. This is but I'm just saying is like this is cool is like you can just say straight up.

[01:26:51] I was like this came from the heart. This came from the soul. And now it's a book. You know, you can read my book with me. Has there ever been anyone where you're like, I'm going to quote you on that? I learned something from the client. You know, they had a sharp brain as well. I had a client once say and then I ended up repeating it for years. She said, don't sit down at the table ever unless the unless the person sitting across

[01:27:20] from you is equal or greater. Everything else is a waste of time. Oh, no, that's cool, too. I have, unfortunately, in the past been dragged to a dinner. Don't sit down at the table unless the person sitting across from you is equal or greater. I like that. Hang with the ones you respect. That is true. It's like because I think COVID was a big wake up call for many.

[01:27:47] Take it as any kind of healthier challenge is like, well, if I have this racist in law to visit, I'm going to just stop, you know, right here, right now. It doesn't do anyone any good. They're not going to change character flaws at all. No, exactly. And that goes with my there's four types of people in the world. There's the happy, the unhappy, the virtuous and the wicked. Wicked. It's kind of obvious, right?

[01:28:14] The happy are the ones that when you walk by, they're like, good morning. The unhappy are the ones that walk by and ignore you, right? With their bad energy. The virtuous are the ones that walk around and they're successful. They have things. They have material. They have what we desire. Right. And then there's the wicked, the ones where they want to be in the negative. They want to stay in that place.

[01:28:42] And so there's four locks and four keys, four types of humans and four ways to unlock their doors. And the happy you treat with happiness. Yes. Same equal energy. Just like when you pass by a human walking, you, hey, hi, same energy. The unhappy you treat with compassion.

[01:29:06] Because like I said, more than likely, they're experiencing some major suffering that you don't know about. And that's why they're unhappy. And then the virtuous, rather than be envious of people that have more than you, can you be supportive of them so much that you start to embody the way that they live and then become them? And then the wicked, the ones where you're not going to change their mind.

[01:29:35] They want to stay in the negativity. You treat them with absolute disregard. Yeah. Especially if it's someone at work. It's like that person. No energy. Yeah. I don't care if it's your blood family. Yeah. If they are stuck in the wicked, they unfortunately are a door that is locked. Yeah. And there is no key that will open them.

[01:30:02] So the only way to protect you is to disregard them. Otherwise, you're going to keep trying to open a locked door. Yeah. It can't be unlocked. Locked. Yeah. And it's unfortunate. It's a harsh reality. But the faster you can accept that in humans, when you recognize that you're walking up to a door that will not unlock, it's up to you to turn around and no longer step up to

[01:30:32] that door anymore because you see that the energy exchange isn't equal or even available. So it becomes fun to navigate life like this. Like you walk up to a human, you're like, oh, they're happy. I'm going to treat them happy. You walk up to a human, you're like, oh, they're super successful. I'm going to see if they can rub off on me a little bit. And merits a response instead of being the opposite. And then you feel that wicked person and you're like, never mind. I'm going to go over here.

[01:31:02] It doesn't make them bad or you better. Right. It just means in order for you to have a good experience around them where it doesn't affect you. If you treat them with disregard, your experience will be more balanced. I like how you're both depersonalizing this. And just as a disclaimer, you know, Steph's not saying give up. You know, you have said explicitly is like make an effort, you know, give a response that merits a response.

[01:31:31] Kind of like when we see an internet troll online, just block. It's not worthy of anyone's time. You won't feel any better. Even with a double edged sword, a double edged insult, you'll just feel crappy because now I've unleashed a side that isn't supposed to be me. I'm not supposed to be Mr. Negative. So I like how you've also that that was a good outline of, you know, if someone gives

[01:31:56] you a fake, you know, staged response, like we don't like to pretend to be something or not. But I guess we'll do a pretend smile back at that person who gave us a false, clearly acting response. You know, they're in salesperson mode. It was like, OK, that's not really. I don't like to pretend to be something I'm not positive or negative.

[01:32:20] So it's cool how you found the big difference in is like, OK, yeah, I'm going to ignore this person. You know, who's just it's hard if they're a boss. Well, I'm just going to have to probably go to HR and say, hey, so and so is completely needs to change their attitude. Even harder when it's your mother. Yeah, but it can be done when you said that departure is like, well, there wasn't any

[01:32:49] middle ground and I'm not trying to dig up that thing, but you're past it. It's like, hey, I'm going to be me then. I choose to live in peace and anything that doesn't match that frequency doesn't exist. You don't need to revisit this person. This has been a very healing interview, hence the whole point of doing these kinds of discussions. And I hope I gave you some positive vibes in return. Sure, absolutely. Thank you for the experience. Oh, and thank you for what you're doing.

[01:33:15] You know, it's like this is a special kind of deal. You know, my mother does animal communication. I have some other friends who do all kinds of other, you know, Pilates classes and what have you. But this is cool in that it's more than just I'm going to be the bigger sum of my parts. I'm going to correct a few issues. But it's like then explore different terrains and find other middle grounds, other places that take away the fear and whatever we can do to eliminate fear. Let's do that, man. Let's everybody needs to do that.

[01:33:46] And so glad this is online. You're utilizing Zoom and all kinds of methods. The sky's not the limit for you, Miss Hannah, as far as I'm concerned. Thank you. Thank you. This was a delight. Follow us on the web on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram. The podcast is available on Podbean, Spotify, iHeartRadio, Anchor, Apple and anywhere else podcasts are available.

[01:34:12] Feel free to review our show and leave comments on any of those sites. Thanks a million for listening. It's a jacked up review show.