Taylor Swift Takeways & Raising the F%cking Bar

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[00:00:58] Hello, hello, all of my beautiful freaking people. Welcome back to another episode of FML Talk.

[00:01:04] I can't fucking believe it's May already. How are we almost halfway through this freaking year?

[00:01:11] Someone sedate me. Okay, sit back, grab a cocktail, and welcome to FML Talk.

[00:01:17] Oh my — wait, how old was the other girl? 19, you believe us, Jake?

[00:01:20] Hey, this is Gabrielle Stone. Good book.

[00:01:22] I'm not an expert.

[00:01:26] What a dick.

[00:01:27] Yeah, but have you seen all the photos on our Instagram?

[00:01:30] And this is FML Talk.

[00:01:32] Oh, no she didn't.

[00:01:34] Ooh, it's May y'all. And ooh, have we all been collectively crying over Taylor Swift's new

[00:01:41] album? Show of hands. Okay. I do want to touch on this a little bit, but this whole episode

[00:01:48] will not be about Taylor Swift. But I've been obviously seeing videos on TikTok and

[00:01:56] a whole bunch of opinions and this and that. And there's haters that are like,

[00:02:01] the whole fucking album sounds the same and why is she always harping on her Xs and

[00:02:06] and I would just like to offer a perspective of how some of this album hit me.

[00:02:13] But I promise there's a bigger learning lesson in all if you're not a T-Swift fan.

[00:02:18] First of all, weird. But if you're not, that's fine. Just keep listening.

[00:02:22] So backstory from what everyone, all of the fans and everybody has gathered is that basically

[00:02:30] she was with this dude Joe for like six years. Everyone thought this album was going to be

[00:02:35] like a lot about him. Turns out it was mostly about this like weird disheveled Matt Healy guy

[00:02:42] who's the lead singer from a band called 1975, who she's had this like on again off again

[00:02:46] situation ship for many, many years. But most recently he came into her life for like three months.

[00:02:53] And it was like very like public and like I'm finally going to like be with you and

[00:02:57] anyways the amount of fucking DMs I've gotten being like, so am I the only one that thinks

[00:03:05] that Joe in this scenario is Daniel and Matt in this scenario is Javier and now she's a

[00:03:10] Travis who is Tay. You have no idea how many people have reached out and told me that. So no,

[00:03:17] you're not alone. But I think it's really interesting coming from an artist standpoint as a writer

[00:03:26] who has like written about her exes. I was really like impressed that she had the balls to put

[00:03:32] this album out because for okay, let's back up. If you're one of the people that listen to

[00:03:39] these songs and you're like, okay, it just feels like we're like beating a dead horse. Like we get it

[00:03:44] and you broke your heart. This sucks. You have not been in toxic relationship. And that's okay.

[00:03:49] And I'm happy for you. But I feel like she really wrote this album for the people who have been

[00:03:57] stuck in love bomb, breadcrumb, fucking purgatory with another individual who they want to

[00:04:08] toxically say is their soulmate when they're just a big fucking lesson that you cannot let go of.

[00:04:14] Most the majority of us have all had one of those in our lives. And so I deeply

[00:04:22] resonated with a lot of her lyrics, a lot of like the messengers in the songs. But

[00:04:29] it really, I felt was ballsy for her to put it out because of the inevitable criticism of like

[00:04:38] really like this guy did such a fucking number on you that you're writing not one but two full albums

[00:04:45] based on like this situation chip. The amount of DMs I get that are people saying

[00:04:52] I was with so and so for like five, six, eight, 10 years. And then this motherfucker came into my

[00:04:58] life for a few months and just wreaked havoc on my heart. I get that DM at least once a week.

[00:05:06] And like why am I not broken up or heartbroken over the long relationship? And it's this like

[00:05:14] blip on the radar that just absolutely like had a stratically destroyed me. I get it,

[00:05:19] I hear you, I see you, I resonate, I've been through it. And not only have I been through it in the

[00:05:26] this full was only a part of my life for a month and a half like love bombing situation.

[00:05:30] I then have been through the on again off again bread crumbing like will he won't he

[00:05:35] fucking like stupid tip toe dance around bullshit for two years after that. So I really like felt

[00:05:43] like she first of all definitely went through that and like got it and was able to put it out

[00:05:51] for so many people who have been through that. I'm so thankful this did not come out in like

[00:05:56] 2017, 2018 because I would have been fucking destroyed. So if you were someone going

[00:06:02] through heartbreak and you're currently listening to this album, I'm so sorry my heart goes out to you.

[00:06:06] But I also think that a lot of the people online that are criticizing this particular album

[00:06:13] are missing or not even criticizing this album, but also the people that are like going so deep

[00:06:19] into like the different theories of like who what could be about and such and such because I do

[00:06:24] feel a lot of it is about her relationship with herself and her relationship with fame also.

[00:06:29] But I feel like people are missing one really big through line that's important in any

[00:06:36] artistic form whether you are a actor, writer, singer, like any performance like creative capacity.

[00:06:45] People who are creatives do their art to work through shit and to heal. And when they then

[00:06:56] put it out to the world, it is a part of that healing usually the completion of it. I remember

[00:07:05] when I read back The Ridiculous Misadventures, I like wanted to smack myself in the face.

[00:07:10] I was like, I remember saying to Tay, I was like, I don't know if I can put this out.

[00:07:14] This is like, it's embarrassing, like how I like just like couldn't like get the fuck out of

[00:07:19] the situation, checkers like see what it was clearly like I wanted to smack me reading this back.

[00:07:27] And it was like really cringy for me. And do you know that that's the message I get most is people

[00:07:35] relating with that back and forth? Why can't I let this person go all this to say we've all been

[00:07:41] there? Well, maybe not, but the majority of us have been there. We've been through it.

[00:07:45] And I think it's really important to recognize when artists put out a piece of art that is clearly

[00:07:55] close to them that they've been through. And the way that she released this and said,

[00:08:00] it's not mine anymore, it's yours now, to me signified like this is like,

[00:08:06] I'm closing this chapter. Now it's yours to take and heal from and, you know,

[00:08:13] take what you want and need from it, which is very reminiscent of how I felt when I published

[00:08:18] both of the books. It's a closing of the chapter, no pun intended, and a completion of

[00:08:25] the journey that you've been on. And it's allowing that to now be someone else's the same way that

[00:08:32] Daniel and Javier became characters in my story. I think the people that she writes about

[00:08:39] once she's able to like release that art and close that chapter, like they then become characters in

[00:08:45] her story. But I resonated with a lot of the lyrics. Well, let me say my past heartbroken self

[00:08:53] resonated with a lot of those lyrics. And I think that she really hit the mark of what it

[00:09:00] feels like to be in a toxic relationship that you just like feel overwhelmed by and like can't

[00:09:07] get out of. So if you are listening to this podcast right now and you're like, fuck, that's me, I'm in it,

[00:09:13] recognizing that is the first step. The fact that you're able to be like,

[00:09:18] this is my thing, this is my Javier, this is my Matt Healey, this is my thing that I cannot let

[00:09:25] go of right now. The fact that you're able to see that and recognize that is a huge step.

[00:09:31] And taking the time to really like sit down, write out descriptive things that have gone on with you

[00:09:42] and that person and the relationship in the past being like, these are the things that it's

[00:09:46] brought into my life that are good. These are the things that are brought into my life

[00:09:50] that is negative. These are the lessons that I've learned, like really start to look at

[00:09:55] it from an outside perspective, looking in as if you were a friend or a parent telling

[00:10:02] you how to get through this relationship or get out of this relationship if that's what you're

[00:10:07] needing. One of my friends, let's be ominous, is going through a interesting time in her

[00:10:22] relationship and realizing that they're not like necessarily on the same page with things.

[00:10:29] And she is now jumping through hoops and convincing herself that like, it's okay and I can sacrifice

[00:10:37] this and I can do this and it's okay because he's such a great guy and this and this and this.

[00:10:43] I just need to get this message out there very clearly. For whatever reason, whether it's your,

[00:10:50] you've been unhealed and you've been attracting assholes for the lessons or

[00:10:55] whatever your past history is, we collectively as men or women have, like the bar has been set

[00:11:05] really low and that sucks. So when we go into a new relationship that it's like, oh my god,

[00:11:16] they're like communicating with me and they're like treating me really well and they're

[00:11:20] respecting me and they're listening to me and I'm having so much fun with them and

[00:11:22] I feel so good with them. Like that's the bare fucking minimum. That's to be expected from a

[00:11:29] relationship that has mutual respect in it. That is the bare minimum. So please do not ever think

[00:11:39] that when you enter into a relationship, like they're like one in a million that you'll never

[00:11:47] find that again. Do you have to weed through some shitty people to find them? Yeah, of

[00:11:51] course. Do you have to heal things within yourself in order to attract those people

[00:11:55] into your life? Yes, we've talked about that many times on this show, but please do not lower

[00:12:01] your standards or sacrifice things that you should not be sacrificing to be with someone

[00:12:10] who is just giving you what you deserve in a relationship. You need to know your worth

[00:12:19] and how wonderful you are that that should be expected. What are they bringing on top of the

[00:12:28] bare minimum? Because our standards and the bar have been too low for too long. It's time to raise

[00:12:38] the expectations and I'm not saying like make a ridiculous list of like 20 things and like check

[00:12:43] them off as you go. I'm talking about like actual things that are to be expected in relationships.

[00:12:49] Like do they respect you? Do they listen to what you say? Do they fight fairly? Do they want to

[00:12:55] grow with you? Like do they want the same things in life as you? Like the, you know, typical shit.

[00:13:01] But please don't sacrifice yourself and your like big dreams and non-negotiables

[00:13:10] to keep someone just because they're the first person that has like communicated well and treated

[00:13:14] you nicely. That is like the prerequisite for being in your life. Okay, let's take a turn

[00:13:25] and talk about the fact that I cannot believe it's actually May right now. WTF. I know that like

[00:13:33] adults, like I'm not an adult. I know that adults have always said like as the years go by time just

[00:13:39] gets quicker and quicker and it really flies and like I never really believed that. I remember

[00:13:45] being in school thinking like I'm never going to get to summer break. Like this is the most

[00:13:50] painfully long year and it never goes any faster but I can now confirm as a whole ass adult

[00:13:58] that's a fucking fact and the last few years especially this year I feel like I blinked

[00:14:06] and we're already almost halfway through and my summer is about to be like cuckoo bananas. We are

[00:14:13] getting ready to go to Portugal with 24 FMLers who I am going to be meeting across the entire

[00:14:21] world which I'm stoked for. Stoked and a little nervous because after the Texas trip I'm

[00:14:26] like oh we're traveling very, very long way with a little baby but we learned a lot from the Texas

[00:14:35] trip. We have a whole sleeping setup that we're lugging with us. Like I'm getting a little less

[00:14:40] nervous and a little more excited as the days get closer. We're also well when you guys are

[00:14:46] hearing this we will be on this trip but we are going up to San Francisco to visit Tay's

[00:14:51] family and friends and then going down to Santa Cruz because I am a bridesmaid in a scout

[00:14:58] Compton's wedding and bringing Mr. Stone along for that as well so this will be our second kind of

[00:15:07] trip. It's a little different because we're driving so it's like a road trip vibe

[00:15:11] but it'll be our second time kind of doing the whole like we're not sleeping in our house with

[00:15:15] all of the comfort setup stuff so it'll be one more test run before we get on an 11 hour flight

[00:15:25] to London and then a three hour flight to Portugal. Everyone fucking pray for me. If you're one of those

[00:15:31] 24 people that are coming with me I'm so excited to meet you, see you, I know some of you

[00:15:36] that are going and then we have another one in November for Tulum and I'm so excited

[00:15:43] to meet and travel with you guys. This is like a wild opportunity that I'm so thankful to have a

[00:15:50] fan base that like is like fuck yeah I want to go to Portugal or Tulum and like go hang out with

[00:15:55] Gabrielle let's do it. So we have that coming up this summer and then we have family coming in

[00:16:01] in July we're going on a little camping trip in July it's just like back to back insanity

[00:16:08] and then my child will be one that's like where I'm trying to process that I feel like I just

[00:16:16] birthed this little angel baby and he's about to be a year old like before we know it that will

[00:16:22] be here. What the fuck? It's really true what they say it just goes to freaking fast and now

[00:16:31] I'm like it's just it's wild to look back on especially mine and Tay's journey and really

[00:16:39] see where it started how hard we fought to like even end up together and now

[00:16:46] we have a whole ass baby together. It's insane you guys it's insane and while I've been loving

[00:16:53] these solo episodes recently where I just kind of get on and shoot the shit with you

[00:16:58] guys with whatever is on my heart I do want to get back to a few of like the old school

[00:17:05] fml talk episodes where we dedicate the solo episodes to a specific topic so I would love

[00:17:13] to know what you guys want to hear if there's something specific that like would just be me

[00:17:22] sitting down covering a topic not necessarily something I would need a guest for or who I

[00:17:29] would want to bring a friend on for like something that's just my take or knowledge on something

[00:17:36] because I know people go back and listen to like the forgiveness episode and the abandonment

[00:17:40] episode so often and we do a lot of that on the minis if you guys are not on the

[00:17:48] patreon subscription I really don't know what you're doing in this fml world but there are like 13 seasons

[00:17:55] of the minis on there and they're so freaking good and different and some are like super funny and super

[00:18:00] ridiculous and tea filled and some are like really deep and like healing and good shit

[00:18:08] so if you want to start binging those you can go to patreon.com slash fml talk

[00:18:13] it's $10 a month you also get added to my close friends on instagram where I post like

[00:18:18] all the things that I can't share with the normal public lots of behind the scenes

[00:18:23] lots of my life and it's just like a fun little community that you can come hang out with and you

[00:18:27] get added to the facebook group there's a whole slew of things anyways but I would like to know

[00:18:31] what kind of like solo episode vibes you guys are wanting and if you're liking the kind of

[00:18:38] shorter episodes we've been doing we've been keeping them closer to like 30 45 minutes which

[00:18:44] I think is more digestible because we're also fucking busy like who has the time so I want to

[00:18:50] know if you guys are digging the time switch the kind of new structure we have where tays on for

[00:18:57] one episode every month it's a solo episode every month it's like a girl talk vibe and a

[00:19:01] guest let me know shoot me some feedback send me a dm or even better drop a comment on one of

[00:19:07] the hosts on the fml talk podcast instagram page and let me know what type of solo episodes like if

[00:19:15] there's topics coming up you want to hear me cover on the show I'm also in the midst of writing book

[00:19:23] three which if you're not on the patreon subscription you don't know that much about at all I'm getting

[00:19:30] close to giving you a little more detail around that but there's still a few things that are

[00:19:36] up in the air but I just started the first edit process it was ambitious as fuck to be like I'm

[00:19:42] just gonna write a book and start the month I birthed a baby like what the fuck was I thinking

[00:19:49] it was a lot it was a lot it is a lot did I make my writing deadline yes was it any good I don't

[00:19:56] know I'm sure the first edit will really start to shape it but I'm really excited to

[00:20:03] share some details about like it's a different kind of book and it's going to be a fun ride for

[00:20:10] the people that have been with me on this journey for sure but what it is doing is bringing up a lot

[00:20:18] of old stuff that I'm kind of like opening the the chests that are neatly packed away in the

[00:20:27] closet to take everything out and like shuffle through the papers and be like okay let's see

[00:20:35] where the lessons were let's see if there's anything left that I need to work on and heal

[00:20:42] like what does this bring up and we're going like way back and some of the things that

[00:20:48] I've written about are things that I've like never really gone into detail about and shared

[00:20:54] it's putting me back in a place where I never thought I'd be because after the first two books

[00:21:01] I was like well everybody knows everything that's it that's the whole the whole kitten caboodle

[00:21:06] but it's putting me back in that frame of like oh how are people going to receive this how are

[00:21:12] people going to react to this I will say I'm a little I care a little less being in that place

[00:21:18] I'm like well what the fuck ever if they you know like people have a problem with it

[00:21:21] they have a problem with it people judge me they're going to judge me but there's always going to be

[00:21:25] that human piece in you that's like oh is this like too much or like is this going to pain my

[00:21:33] mother to read or is this going to like give people a different lens and part of it is terrifying

[00:21:41] and part of it is exciting and that is completely indicative of everything that we do in life

[00:21:47] that is supposed to make us grow and be like a big monumental thing everything that has ever

[00:21:56] changed me in my life in a positive way has been both of those things wrapped up into one exciting

[00:22:02] and terrifying and it's when you are able to recognize that and walk through that the stuff

[00:22:10] that's on the other side is going to be magical for you so if there's something in your life

[00:22:16] that you're like oh my god this is absolutely terrifying to me you should probably go do that

[00:22:22] this is your sign if there's something that like has been on the table whether it's a solo trip

[00:22:28] or writing a book or going on a date or whatever it is that's like been on the table and you're

[00:22:34] like I don't know that sounds fucking terrifying maybe I'll go watch Netflix and eat some ice

[00:22:38] cream go do the terrifying thing this is me pressuring you into doing that so you can

[00:22:43] blame me if it goes horribly but whenever there is something in your life that is terrifying

[00:22:50] and a little bit exciting it is usually going to bring you some fucking fantastic shit so

[00:22:59] take a deep breath close your eyes jump and know that the universe is going to fucking catch you

[00:23:14] okay we are going to take a turn and jump into one of your fml stories here we go

[00:23:26] Gabrielle I have been anxiously or no longer anxiously waiting to send you my story that

[00:23:31] began fall 2019 right before covid lockdown imperfect timing I grew up in Dallas eldest of

[00:23:38] three girls perfectionist independent type a shout out girl me too struggled with eating

[00:23:43] disorders chose the worst men have a master's degree and suddenly found myself in a manipulative

[00:23:48] abusive and then physically abusive relationship at 37 my therapist later told me that I was

[00:23:54] choosing men I could control eye opening this male took over my life I quit my very successful job

[00:24:02] and suddenly one night he shoved me into my counter I bruised my arm broke the granite clearly

[00:24:08] my working out paid off and bashed my mac book into my counter I found myself in the midst of

[00:24:15] lockdown alone and on my knees asking God why so about a week later I was getting lonely

[00:24:21] I'd filed a police report but didn't know where to pick up the pieces of my life in lockdown

[00:24:28] so in my lonely state I decided the smart thing would be to go to dinner with a high school friend

[00:24:33] male of course on her way to dinner he shared that he himself had a crazy female who was stalking him

[00:24:40] me I love this this is written like how I write me okay but what does that even mean

[00:24:46] him she follows me or she drives around looking for my car me well if she actually shows up we can

[00:24:52] leave not 10 minutes in he looks over my shoulder and says she is here I have to look I look and I

[00:24:59] see one of my former students stop side note I was a high school teacher in my early 20s that

[00:25:06] my students can easily be early 30s me that is my former student him okay let's see what happened

[00:25:13] my students sees me and comes to chat at this time I can't tell you what the female looks like

[00:25:18] we leave dinner I go home and think this is all well until about two hours later in that night

[00:25:25] I start getting calls texts anonymous messages on social media threatening me if you think your

[00:25:31] hate messages on instagram are bad you have no idea a jealous enraged and psychotic human

[00:25:36] was capable of doing me wtf him I told you me make her stop I even called my former student

[00:25:44] and asked him to get her to stop fast forward a week why is there a photo of my ex-boyfriend

[00:25:50] with this stalker girl on social media they don't know one another fast forward another week

[00:25:55] I leave my apartment and go to my detached garage my garage is open my car is totaled

[00:26:01] and I am living a full on nightmare whoa now I have no car no job alone and losing my mind

[00:26:08] all during covid fuck man I begin being stalked and harassed in a lockdown world by this horrible

[00:26:16] human being I have I have to document everything she does for two months she's finally arrested

[00:26:21] August 2020 she doesn't stop I then get a phone call from a detective helping me with

[00:26:28] the stalker girl I've now picked up shanna you have a warrant for aggravated assault with

[00:26:33] a deadly weapon me what detective yes here's the best lawyer I know call him how did this happen

[00:26:42] my ex-boyfriend was so angry that he gave the police a false report after he'd broken in my

[00:26:47] home with stalker girl and feared being caught he was afraid he was going to jail

[00:26:54] so he had to outdo anything to keep himself safe I call a lawyer think I'm okay on bond

[00:27:02] and then I get picked up from my home and taken to jail oh my god I have nobody at home with me

[00:27:10] and spend the next 10 hours in jail during covid and I don't know how to even pick up my life

[00:27:17] three years later she is arrested three times protective order and she still does this

[00:27:23] shit to me Gabrielle your books were the best I did solo travel my whole life

[00:27:28] I picked up and moved to Australia with a backpack work visa one hostel night booked

[00:27:34] after college I did promise myself one new country a year after that is real cuba peru

[00:27:39] nicaragua Costa Rica France Guatemala but nothing could stop crazies I got a message on

[00:27:46] Facebook in January of 2023 from a guy from high school and my life has been amazing ever since

[00:27:52] but the therapy and picking up the pieces for three years has been hell never would I imagine

[00:27:57] that a relationship would end with me being arrested having a stalker and while awaiting

[00:28:02] expungement I meet my prince charming who I had known my whole life all the best

[00:28:08] janna holy shit dude and I love that the title is fml horror story via Dallas

[00:28:16] wow man people are fucking crazy that's like out of a Netflix show walking into your detached

[00:28:27] garage and seeing your entire car just like disheveled and fucked I mean I guess my first question

[00:28:36] is for the original guy that you like went on a date with and like the stalker saw you with him

[00:28:43] like was the dick that good like why was she so obsessed with this dude and like I need more

[00:28:55] explanation around that but like holy hell girl I can't imagine dealing with all of that during

[00:29:01] COVID I know just from some minor stuff it's not minor but stuff with my resurgence with my

[00:29:09] ex the anxiety that that puts you into and makes you feel like you just can't fucking breathe so I'm

[00:29:16] so sorry that you experienced that after coming out of a horrible relationship and how the fuck

[00:29:22] did your abusive ex and this chick like end up being together I need to know so many things

[00:29:28] I feel like this is the start of I haven't watched it yet but I'm we're about to start

[00:29:33] watching baby reindeer on Netflix which is like a true story that the guy wrote about

[00:29:37] like his stalker experience and this is like it's giving that vibe so like maybe go pitch a show

[00:29:46] because it's TV worthy it's insane to me friendly reminder as we close this episode

[00:29:52] how we started with some T-swift if you guys are in your feels binging that album and listening

[00:29:59] repeat just be careful because I have caught myself a few times I wake up many times during

[00:30:09] the night like more so since I've had a baby it's like kind of shitty to like pee or to look at

[00:30:15] the monitor for like whatever fucking reason but whenever I wake up I'm now either singing a Taylor

[00:30:21] Swift song from that album or miss Rachel it's like one or the other so it's either like Mr. Sun

[00:30:27] Mr. Golden Sun or like I'm so depressed I feel like it's my birthday

[00:30:34] that's my life right now guys but just a friendly reminder that like when you are continuously singing

[00:30:40] a song in your head your brain doesn't really know the difference between like I'm being directed to

[00:30:47] feel this for example I'm so depressed I act like it's my birthday every day

[00:30:53] whether or not you're like just enjoying jamming out singing that song like you are still telling

[00:30:58] your brain that so make sure you are continuously going to your love place saying some positive

[00:31:06] affirmations telling your brain that you're fucking stoked and excited about life and loving all the

[00:31:13] things because we want to make sure we're still giving our our brain positive messaging

[00:31:19] while we're enjoying the songs that we love I love you guys I will see you next week

[00:31:28] all right fmlers if you don't want to miss an episode make sure to follow on your favorite podcast

[00:31:34] app and if you're loving the show drop us a five star rating and leave a review you can keep

[00:31:40] up with me on instagram at gabrielle stone or the podcast page at fml talk podcast for all the

[00:31:46] merch and books signed personally by me you can shop the fml line on eatprayfml.com and as always

[00:31:54] have a fucking self-love cocktail on me cheers this podcast has been brought to you by podcast nation