Episode 284 - Love is in the Air

[00:00:04] It's time to feel the rage! Welcome to Film Rage where we talk movies in theaters, streaming and co-elastic films as well. Directors and actors beware as you cannot hide from the rage. My name is Bryson, I'm part of the Film Rage crew which also includes Jim. Hey there Jim. What the hell is that? I have Ross, I'm shaking my milk duds. Milk duds are gross. And also we have the Merman sporting another Deadpool shirt. What's with you and Deadpool and Wolverine?

[00:00:31] I'm sorry that everyone should be into. This movie is like a thousand years old now. Why are you... It doesn't matter. Okay, whatever. So with the introductions out of the way, let's remove... No, let's not move on, let's rage on. Let's move on to... Don't we have something going on? Don't we have something going on? What's going on? Raging on. Let's rage on. Alright, thanks to all who have been supporting us. If you love our independent podcast or even just like it a little bit, why don't you like, subscribe, share and give us a five star rating on your listening platform.

[00:01:00] Or, support us and join the Film Rage community at buymeacoffee.com forward slash Film Rage YYC while quantities last. If you cannot commit to a membership, you can still buy us a movie rental and dare us to see a terrible film. And we'll watch it. Play it anywhere in the cinemas in the world. Now, let's get to raging!

[00:01:24] What would the amazing moment predict? What would the amazing moment predict? Will he predict the rage or will he predict the mondo? Will he tell us all what Jim and Bryce are in the movies? Watch out now, kids, cause here he comes. He's coming swimming to you. Hmm. Swimmery, swimmery. Swimmery, swim.

[00:01:55] Swimmery, swimmery. Swimmery, swim. Swim all the way to our hearts, our little hearts, hearts, hearts. And there's a lot of hearts happening this week, baby! Yeah. Oh my god, so many movies. So much motherfucking hearts! Just when I think there's enough movies you guys find more that I've never even heard of that you go to. Isn't that awesome? Let's just whittle them away, shall we? Yes! I'm still here.

[00:02:25] Yes! I don't know who the hell saw this one. Somebody saw it. I saw it. Okay, just you? Yep. Alright then. I don't know. It was at all the film festivals. It won some awards and stuff. I think it might be nominated for Best Picture. I think it's nominated for Stuff. I think it's actually nominated for Best Picture. And it's got subtitles. It's one of the 47 titles. Yeah, so yeah. Best International? I don't know. Best Picture. Best Picture. Yeah, really? Yeah, it is. Now you make me want to look it up. I'm pretty sure she's nominated for something too.

[00:02:55] Yeah. Anyway, yeah. I was about to look it up on my computer, but my computer's just perpetually frozen. It's a lot of subtitles. It's a touching story, blah, blah, blah. Yeah, let's go with Mondo. Going with Mondo. Nice. Heart Eyes. Heart Eyes. Heart Eyes. The latest Valentine's Day slasher flick. Yeah. Ish. Ish. It's slasher. How's it? Ish. You're ish. I am.

[00:03:23] Because apparently the Heart Eyes killer does not enjoy love. Well, we're going to talk about that later. It looks like a piece of shit. Wow. Wow. Jim is a little tougher on horror films than the rest of us, so I think he raged about it. Bryce probably managed to give it a meh. He probably found something to like about it. Ah. There you go. I think so.

[00:03:52] Love Hurts. Love Hurts. Ki-Hu Kwan. Yeah. Which I have long been waiting for. Yes. Since I saw the trailer anyway. Okay. I have not been waiting for it. Being there with Jim to see this, the one movie I did see. Mm-hmm. I'm afraid to say I don't think we really enjoyed it as much as we wanted to. Okay. Okay. I'm going to go on a limb and say Double Rage on this one. Okay. Double Rage. Then we got Dark Nuns. Dark Nuns.

[00:04:22] Which I actually- Of all the nuns. All the nuns. They're dark nuns and they're Korean. Yes. Yes. I actually posted a trailer for this on our Facebook. Yes, you did. To get our listeners ready for it. I didn't know- Korean juice is flowing. I didn't know it came out this soon. Otherwise, I might have actually gone to see it. Yeah. But we- Yeah. If it was up to Jim, we never even would have seen it. Eh. Why do I have so many fucking jobs here? But you did. Well, that's why I always step in and save the day. It's kind of my thing. Yeah. Yeah. Super Bryce.

[00:04:52] Yeah. Thank you. It's Korean- Sorry, Supa Bryce. Supa. It's Korean. It's a horror movie. It's got nuns in it. Yeah, of course. Double Mondo. It sounds like it, doesn't it? It does. It's like everything that you think we would love. Everything you guys love. Yeah. Becoming- Give me more nuns. Dark nuns. We need more dark nuns movies. Becoming from Korea. What you need- Korean nuns are the best. Scooter.

[00:05:18] If it's a Korean-directed dark nun movie with Russell Crowe. We don't even have to see it. I will just stop watching movies from then on in and just watch that every day of my life till I die. For the rest of my life. Becoming Led Zeppelin. Yeah. Now, one of you guys is older than me. I don't remember them very well. That's right. But I still listen to them on The Reg. The Reg? I don't know. Is that an expression? Do the kids say that? Maybe. I don't know.

[00:05:48] You know what? Do you have the 8-tracks? No, I don't have any 8-tracks. Because you're young. I am. I'm just a pup. I had an 8-track. There you go. I had an 8-track as well. Oh, no. I had some 8-tracks, yeah. I had the double 8-track on physical graffiti. I had Kiss Destroyer on 8-track and Pink Floyd the Wall on 8-track. There you go. Nice. Which I think was on two 8-tracks. It was. Just like physical graffiti was on two 8-tracks. I don't know about this one.

[00:06:13] I know you guys probably both like Led Zeppelin, but this is a documentary type thing. Right. Which we also like. Not all the time. That's true. Let's go double meh. Double meh. Universal Language. Some Canadian fare. Yeah. It actually came out. It was at SIF. Yeah. But you guys both missed it. We did. There's a lot of movies at SIF that we missed, unfortunately.

[00:06:42] I saw parts of it because I worked there. I think I had tested it at least twice. So you should have a pretty good idea of whether. That's right. I didn't actually watch it. Well, you saw parts of it. I just made sure it had videoed audio and captioning. That's all I really cared. Nice. So, yeah. Because it's a. I've got a pimple on my cheek. Festival type movie. Let's go double Mondo for that one. All right. And Bryce has a pimple. And I have a pimple on my cheek. Bryce and his pimple. You know what?

[00:07:12] I wonder if pimple is something that is universally the same word in every language. I'm going to go with no. Also known as a zip. Yeah. We don't know Kleenex. People call it Kleenex. People call it zip or what they call it. It's a facial tissue. Yeah. Stop saying it's not Kleenex. It's a facial tissue. Don't Google things. You do an internet search.

[00:07:39] I'm sick of all this corporate garbage that we're talking about. Actually, nobody uses Google anymore. No? What do they use? No. They use AI search. They do an internet search. They do AI searches. What the hell is an AI search? Google is so awesome. They renamed the Gulf of Mexico. That's right. I don't know what AI search is. See, these are all new words for you. What is an AI search? You should search that on the web. Yeah. Just type in AI and see where you go. I do an internet search on AI search? Yes. Sure.

[00:08:09] Yeah. Anyway. This is dumb. You're up. Start talking. You know what? I'm still here. Yes. So, yeah. It's all mine. First movie we're going to take. Not getting any younger either. We're going to talk about is I'm Still Here. I am the only one that watched this, which I don't understand why. But. Because my calendar wouldn't have lied. I love it. Yeah. Well, that's it. It's the latest movie from Walter Salas. You know him from, he did like the Motorcycle Diary. He makes pretty good movies.

[00:08:37] This is about the dictatorship in between 64 and 85. It takes place mainly in Rio de Janeiro. Brazil. Yeah. Brazil. Early 70s. Eunice and Rubens have a family. Rubens, six years earlier, had like a self-exile due to the coup in 64. He comes back and it's about their family and how they're kind of coping with things.

[00:09:07] Of course, they know when he comes back, it's still under this dictatorship. And all of a sudden they are being watched. And next thing you know, Mr. Ruben is. Daddy goes bye-bye. He just pretty much disappears. They go, they grab him. They say, we're just going to take you in for questioning. And he's never seen from again. So it's a story of from that point forward of how Eunice, the mother of this family, deals. How she perseveres.

[00:09:35] How she doesn't ever give up on finding out exactly what happened to him. She knows that he's dead, but she still demands that at some point she gets a death certificate. Yeah, she needs the insurance money. Yeah. It's an amazing movie about an amazing lady who... And it's a true story. Yeah, and it's a true story.

[00:09:59] And in her late 40s, she ends up getting her law degree after all these things have happened and ends up helping the underprivileged. Just a special, special lady. It really is an amazing story how she keeps this family together in just the worst of circumstances. And how she didn't get killed in the sounds of things. Yeah, well, there's... She's putting pressure on her.

[00:10:20] And there's a point within days of him being questioned and never coming back, she actually and her oldest daughter get taken in and get questioned. Her oldest daughter gets released after a couple of days and they hold her for like two weeks and question her. And it's just heartbreaking. Yeah, but it's a really good movie. Really worth seeing. It is definitely Mondo. Nice.

[00:10:47] And if you get a chance, I believe it is actually, I think it's nominated for Best Picture this year. Not that you care, Jim, but... No, I don't. But it's nice to see movies like this get recognized, whether you care about the Academy or not. A lot of people do. And it's nice that this is getting recognized because it is a very good film. Well, you know, actually, it's funny you should say that because it kind of proves the point that I've been trying to do. Yes. About the Academy, which is how about you fucking nominate some international films?

[00:11:17] Because... Yeah, that's the good thing that's coming out of this stupid let's have like nine nominees or whatever it is for Best Picture is we're getting, you know, like we got Perfect Day, got nominated. This is getting nominated. There's some, you know, international films that are getting recognition. And, which is good because people are going to watch it. They're going to go, wow, that got nominated. I should go watch it. They're going to watch it and know what happens then.

[00:11:46] People start searching out other international films. That's the hope. And then the next thing you know, maybe we can just push Hollywood back a little bit. Just maybe we can get like three or four, out of the three or four releases that come out, maybe we can get one international feature like every week. Would that be nice? That would be... You know what? We could change our podcast altogether if they just released them all here. Yes. It would be so good. We would never have to talk about Hollywood. But yeah, long story short, I'm still here. So worth watching.

[00:12:16] It is a mondo. The performances are great. And Walter Sal is... He's a pretty good director. I'm enjoying his stuff. There you go. I will be seeing it probably this weekend because I think it's being released. Or if not this weekend, next weekend is going to be released on VOD, I'm sure. Ah, VOD. On VOD. Yeah. In VOD we trust. In VOD we trust, Murray. Yeah. All right. So our first love story of the week we're going to talk about...

[00:12:44] Yeah, they're all love stories from here on in, aren't they? Sorry. It's all about that. Heart Eyes. Heart Eyes. Yeah, Dark Nuns is a real love story. I know. Okay. Well, how is it not? Okay. Well, I guess we'll hear how that is, but... I think that by the end of that, those nuns have great affection for each other. Yeah. Without spoiling anything. You mean in memorandum? But then we'll get to that. Let's not jump ahead. Heart Eyes.

[00:13:12] The first in our romance of the week. Here it is. So... Yes. This is what a horror slasher rom-com looks like. Yeah. Because Murray originally thought it was just a slasher, but it's actually... Oh, I'm sure there's love in there somewhere. It's actually a rom-com that happens to have slasher in it. Yeah.

[00:13:35] With gore using real practical effects and both corny romance and corny comedy bits where the writing through the story was creative and fun and gory and the gore was juicy. It was so juicy. And when I say juicy, I've never said as juicy a gore as we got in this movie. I mean, when evil lurks, definitely was... It was almost as juicy, but not nearly as juicy as this film.

[00:14:06] Just be ready for the juice. It was really juicy, Murr. Lots of blood, I get it. No, there's a lot of... Not just blood. Juice. There's juice. It's the only juice on it. There's so much... Not only blood, but there's other bodily fluids that are projectiling out of people. It's great. It's juicy. It's very juicy. Yep. Awesome. So, but this is not like your typical rom-com.

[00:14:34] Because in most rom-coms, the woman is usually an idiot and the guy is a jerk. And in this case... They end up together anyway. Both these people are likable. Yeah, they are. And you're rooting for them right from the start. And all the interactions are cute and funny. But wrapped around this love story is a slasher who is killing people on Valentine's Day. Yes. The story hums along really quite nicely.

[00:15:04] In fact, I would say it runs amazingly well. But then we get to the third act. And this is where most horror movies kind of lose their steam. The story got predictable and overly ridiculous. And a throwback to say Scream 2 or Scream 1 or Scream 3 or whatever Scream. Just pick a Scream.

[00:15:32] They're all horrible except for the first one. I believe it was produced by the producers of Scream. Oh, isn't that funny? Yeah. Yeah. It had so much potential. And then I think someone said, you know what we need here? Because this movie is so good. What we need to do is get one of the crappy writers from the last five Scream movies to finish this off. Because you know what people want to see now? They want to see an original idea. But they want to see a Scream finish. Yep.

[00:16:01] Because apparently people like those movies. I don't want to see a Scream finish. No. Neither did I. Neither do most intelligent people. So this gets a huge, huge props for doing a great original spin on a rom-com genre. And as most of you know, I normally hate rom-coms. And in fact, this would have been an awesome film. This almost would have made it to Mondo.

[00:16:34] But even though this had the Scream ending, it had the gore, it had the comedy, it had great lead characters. I am going to give it a meh. Because I didn't, as much as I hated the Scream ending, up until the end, I was completely entertained. Well, let me say not, up until the last 20 minutes. So I fully, fully enjoyed having this. And surprisingly so. I thought I was going to not like this movie. But I did. So did I. Yeah. Yeah.

[00:17:01] I went into this thinking that I wasn't going to like it either. But this was so much fun for the better part of an hour. In fact, a little more than an hour. So much fun. And my God, Michaela Watkins as her boss at the ad agency. Oh God, yeah. I just can't get enough of Michaela Watkins. She's hilarious. She is so good in everything she's in. I was glad last year when she actually finally got that one movie where she starred in it. And I thought she carried it very, very well.

[00:17:30] I wish I could remember the name of the movie. But it was good. But this movie is, as you mentioned, it's so juicy. The kills are inventive. It is such. It made me think, all right. We had In a Violent Nature earlier. This is a different type of slasher this time around. But we got the return of the slasher. And I was very excited for an hour. And then it just falls off of the cliff in the last 20, 25 minutes. And it's like, what in the hell?

[00:17:59] It's literally like it was written by somebody completely different. It's like, they're like, okay, you right there. You've got this really good idea. You write the first hour and 10 minutes of this movie. Okay. Now, I don't want to know what you would have done with the end of it. Okay. Schleppy McSchleppenstein over there. From the Scream franchise. From the Scream franchise. You finish it off. You write the rest of it. Because it didn't even mesh that well. No.

[00:18:27] It was literally like all of a sudden someone else wrote the end. And it just, it is not a good ending. And it went from being one of the more fun times that I've had at the movies in quite a while. It was almost Dogman. Yeah. It was Dogman for full slasher movies. Rom-com slasher movies. Rom-com slasher movies. And then it just got so frustrating in the last 25 minutes.

[00:18:52] And even as frustrated as I was, I'm not going to forget that first hour and the good time that I have. The good times. It is definitely a meh. But that last 25 minutes. Oh my God. It got just so dumb. And we, do we have to have, why can't we not have a stupid dumb twist ending where it's like you have to reveal the killer? And why do, and it's got to be like multiple people.

[00:19:19] Like, why can't it just be a straight ahead story? Like I've had enough. I know. Well, well, the thing that, that makes it dumb about that, like. But this was a myth. Yeah. We, we talk, you can push some buttons if you feel like it. I love when Murray pushes my buttons. I like it when he pushes my buttons, especially the back button. Yes. So the thing about this. You push that back button hard enough. Okay. I'm going to stop. Exactly.

[00:19:47] You know, here's the thing though, is that when they put these, we've talked about this in mysteries and things like this, where they'll throw in a twist that you couldn't see, like, like, like, like, it was like, oh, I didn't see that coming. Like, like it's because there was nothing that indicated it. Like, like that kind of shit is just like, it's just fucking lazy writing. It's lazy, lazy writing. And the writing was so strong in this that they could have, they could have ended it like Harry Met Sally and they could have had.

[00:20:16] Well, yeah, they just could have just kept on going with it. Have the killer caught and unmasked it and like, okay, I don't know who that is. Who cares? It was so much fun. I would have got away with it if it wasn't for you. It's like, we don't need to know. It didn't have to be someone that we'd already met. And it was, it's a hard eyes killer. He's been, and it doesn't even make sense because he's traveling all over the place. And like, yeah. Yeah. And then they try it. Like they throw something in. That's like a twist.

[00:20:43] There's a, maybe we've given too many spoilers already, but the, but the, the, you could stop watching after an hour. Anyways, the, after an hour, just walk, turn it off. Walk out. After an hour and 10, just walk out. And you'll be like, wow, that was really good. That was a really good movie. It's Mondo. Then they, they try it. Like they make no tie to the fact that they go to this guy. Were you in this city when these murders happened? Like that whole part was just fucking stupid too. That was totally random. It was dumb.

[00:21:10] It was like, okay, so he is the, like he's supposed to be the red herring. Like, like, why would he be in those cities? Like he travels, but that, like that's way too coincidental. And he can't be the red herring because he was attacked by the killer. So it just, but they know. Yeah. You know what? Just walk out after an hour and 10 minutes. So yeah. Yeah. And make sure you, you enjoy yourself. You enjoy yourself. That's right.

[00:21:40] And, and, and Michaela Watkins is awesome. I love her. Everybody in this was awesome. Yeah. They were actually. For the first hour. It was, it was 10 minutes. Yep. All right. Murray, why don't you tell us about the movie you got to see? Love hurts. Love hurts. Which I have been looking for as I, as I said, since I saw the trailer. Cause you know, it's a good short round. I don't know what that means. Yeah. It's back to being short round.

[00:22:06] It is the story of mild mannered Marvin Gable played by key Hugh Kwan, AKA short round. Marvin is a happy go lucky realtor who bakes cookies for his clients and coworkers and loves to sell houses. That is until his evil brother knuckles or is it Sonic? Uh, tries to kill him and awakens the bad mofo that he used to be.

[00:22:35] He withstands attacks from numerous to hit men, a reunion with the love of his life and still tries to make that sale. You know what they say? Love hurts. Love scars. Love wounds. And marks any heart, not tough or strong enough. Bryce knows what I'm talking about. Yes, he does. Unfortunately, that song has nothing to do with his movie. Or fortunately.

[00:23:06] When I saw Mr. Short Round in his own action movie, I was pretty hyped. Then they threw in a Celine Dion song in the trailer. And they had me. I was hooked. That also was not part of the film. This film, set in Wisconsin, but shot in Winnipeg, Manitoba, seemed like a surefire action movie. Someday I hope to be shot in Winnipeg, Manitoba. I don't want to be caught dead in Winnipeg. What? It's so awesome.

[00:23:36] Kee-Hoo Kwon of the Goonies and Temple of Doom and Everything Everywhere fame is actually a skilled martial arts expert who spent time as a fight coordinator on other films. So I can totally believe him as a certified ass kicker. He is instantly likable, funny, and charming. The action scenes were amazing, bold, fast, and furious. Not to mention creative.

[00:24:05] They fought with a giant fork and spoon. Yes, off the wall. That was awesome. That alone should have made it a mondo. Unfortunately, the plot was garbage. What? Some kind of lame revenge plot by his gangster brother Knuckles with a crooked sidekick who has his own evil plans. They employ various hitmen, including Marshawn Beast Mode Lynch, which apparently is now his

[00:24:35] official name. Oh, nice. I actually really loved Marshawn Lynch. If this wasn't unbelievable enough, there was a ridiculous love story between one of the big bad hitmen and Marvin's moronic assistant. I also thought I liked that part too. Yeah, that part was okay. As much as I wanted to like this film. The Raven. For my man short round, the action was not enough to save it. But watching him kick ass was enough to save it from being a rage. There you go.

[00:25:05] It was a very low man though. All right. I enjoyed the action parts. That's about it. Nice. Okay. Well, let me tell you something. Okay. Love hurts. It does hurt. Yeah. Or should I say Goonies 2, where we get Data and Mikey in their toughest treasure hunt yet. Is that their names?

[00:25:29] Data with his mad gadgets that he incorporates into his Kung Fu and Mikey, who now owns a real estate company. A very rotund man. Yeah. Okay. So it's not Goonies 2, but we do get Sean Austin sitting in. Aston. Aston. Ass man. Ass man. We do get Sean Ass man. Aston. Austin. Like as an Aston Martin. It's not Austin. It's Aston. Well, it depends on your accent.

[00:25:58] No, it doesn't. Depends on if you want to say his name right. In this gangster love story, Valentine's Revenge story, where the fight scenes are reminiscent of Jackie Chan fight sequences, where they incorporate all the things on hand into the fight scenes. The story has Ki Kwan, who was a killer for the mob slash his brother, who was supposed

[00:26:25] to kill someone who stole money from said brother, but is also the love of his life. But he can't. So he becomes a real estate agent. Sounds so popery, doesn't it? It sounds just too convoluted. Just. Yeah, it does. So, yes. Because it's kind of is on Valentine's Day. Okay.

[00:26:51] So, on Valentine's Day, said love interest comes back to say she wants her old life back. Then, we get 83 minutes of fighting. With. Well, not really. Some silly lines and a story that has been done a million times before. So nothing original here. And although seeing short round kick ass for 83 minutes, the story does not stand up on

[00:27:20] quite a few levels. I did mention 83 minutes. That actually felt more like 120 minutes. Plus, people who should have died never die. And no one actually dies. And why would our love interest bring a taser to a gunfight? Didn't make any sense to me. Multiple tasers, apparently. Yeah. Just kept firing. She just kept. It never runs out of juice. They never stopped getting charged. Yep.

[00:27:46] And why, if you made, if you're made by the mob, would you still try and sell a house? Like, he's already been made. And he's like, you know what? I should probably try and sell. This is not real mafia. Yeah, but it doesn't matter. This is his punk ass brother who thinks he's a gangster. Yeah, but it's still, he's almost killed a couple of times. And so, instead of actually going on the run to hide, he's like, you know what I should do? I should probably try and close this sale. Yeah, of course.

[00:28:16] Always be selling. Yeah. Okay. That made a lot of sense based on the movie. For sure. So, yeah. The nostalgia of the Goonies wasn't enough to keep anyone's interest long enough in this. The fight scenes, though, for me, did help. Because I'm a huge fan of early Jackie Chan stuff. And this was very reminiscent of Jackie Chan. It was. It felt very Jackie Chan-y. Yeah.

[00:28:42] It's like the old Kung Fu movies where they use anything that's around them in the fight. It's not just all about guns and swords. The Jackie Chan movies were entertaining. Yeah. They were much more entertaining. Half this movie was entertaining. Was it? Portions of it. Portions of it. So, the Kung Fu was fun. And some of the, you know, when you're using that stuff, it was a bit of original. Some of the comedy bits did land. And I did like his assistant falling in love with the...

[00:29:11] There's the guy you guys like. I forgot to mention him. With the mopey poet. That Reese guy. The Reese guy. There was enough things in here that I didn't hate it. So, it got a little meh for me, too. There you go. It's not a good movie. No, it's not. At all. And I can understand why people would hate it. I just was having enough fun with humor watching it. Yeah. Parts of it were fun. Yeah. But, yeah. I was disappointed that it wasn't as good as it should have been. No.

[00:29:41] Again, you know, these people write him into a story that is one of the most original stories. That his comeback is in one of the most original stories ever. And then he comes back as this. Yeah. Yeah. This is like his first starring role since his Oscar. But, yeah. All right, Brycey. Love hurts. How bad does love hurt you? Pretty bad. I thought. I will say that I did like The Raven and Ashley.

[00:30:08] I thought that little love story was actually the only good thing in this. Other than Marshawn Lynch, actually. I don't know what it is about Marshawn Lynch. I don't know what it is. But every time he's on screen, he makes me laugh. He just does. Maybe he shouldn't. But he does. I will say that if Rhys Darby was on the mesmerized list still, he would be off in a heartbeat. Oh, God. In a bad movie, he was the least mesmerizing person in the whole thing.

[00:30:36] I've never seen him worse in a movie. All of a sudden, Rhys Darby gets on screen and you have an expectation that, okay, at least I'm going to be entertained for the next few minutes that he's on the screen. Holy crap was I ever not entertained by him this time around. He was awful in this. The whole movie was just mindless. I hated every second of it. 83 minutes, as you mentioned, felt like so much longer.

[00:31:04] How does an 83-minute movie feel like two and a half hours? I was crawling out of my skin watching this movie. This was not good on any level. I hated this movie. It was a rage. There you go. I didn't think you'd like it. No, I knew you wouldn't like it. I almost got there too, to be honest. I just... I was close, but it's hard for me to give it. I did like... Well, that's not why I'm doing it. I enjoyed the action movies.

[00:31:32] I did like the action, and I did like some of the side stories that... Because I like the characters. I think the characters in this... There was a couple characters I enjoyed. By the way, Ariana DeBose, she's been good in stuff in the past. She was just looked lost in this movie as Rose. I just... I... She should... Her character's kind of not even essential. No. Well, she kind of is essential. She's a minor plot point. She's the main plot of this whole movie. Yeah?

[00:32:01] I could add her die, and he comes back. Whatever. At any rate, she did nothing in this to make it like... This whole movie sucked. It just sucked. So, it's true. Love does hurt. Love does hurt. All right. Nice. Rage. All right. Well, let's talk about two of our favorite... Well, three of our favorite things. All right. Dark. These are a few of my favorite things. And Korean films. Yeah, I like all those. All right.

[00:32:31] So, Korean super nun. Yes. Sorry. I'm sorry. It's not super nun. It's super dark nun. Oh. Battles evil in the form of a demon who possesses a child who's actually a teenager. They keep referring to him as a child, but he's definitely a teenager. Yeah. I don't know why they refer to him as a child. I don't know. Maybe it's lost in translation. Yeah, exactly. Here again, we get another Korean spiritual horror film that's full, and I mean full, of

[00:33:00] doctrine and process and steps and shaman and priests who are dicks and priests from Italy who had some secret Jesus power stuff they need to also use as part of the exorcism ceremony. Plus lots and lots and lots and lots of stuff happening. Sort of. Basically, there are two dark nuns that have shaman powers. I feel like one of them should go Shazam!

[00:33:30] Also, one happens to be a doctor, and the other is just a super motherfucking dark nun, demon-ass-kicking bitch, which is kind of her nickname. And from the beginning of the movie, they have been trying. It's not her nickname. It is! The one who calls her a bitch. She did call her a bitch. She did it a couple of times. That's her nickname. She didn't have all those superlatives that you added to it. Well, that's my take on it. But the bitch part was definitely from her friend. Fair enough.

[00:34:01] And from the beginning of the movie, they have been trying to exorcise this demon from this kid slash teenager. Pretty ineffectively. Yeah, pretty ineffectively. Most of the priests are sexist and say nuns can't do stuff because they're nuns. Yeah. And one of the priests is like, I don't even believe in exorcisms. So our super dark nun doesn't take no for an answer. They're up against it. They're like, screw it up. We get a few times that they try to get this exorcism done.

[00:34:30] Sometimes with swimming chickens and most times with a drum and some chanting. One of them really likes her sweets. That's right. As mentioned earlier. It's a lot of ice cream. That's right. And who doesn't? As mentioned earlier, this is just too much doctrine and time spent exercising and not much else. Plus, it's a little confusing at times why and what's actually happening. All in all, I didn't hate it because there was enough demoning and super nun action.

[00:34:59] I was entertained, but do expect to be a little confused as you watch this film. The only complaint in regards to the demoning is, and you all know my thoughts on demons. If you have a demon or a ghost, you better make sure that you have the right amount of motherfucking demon crackling going on through this entire movie. All we got was one crack, not even a crackling. It was just a crack. Yeah, I don't care.

[00:35:27] I mean, this is a motherfucking Korean demon film. They are literally the creators of demon crackling. And all we get is crack. Yeah, well, crack's fine. So for that, plus too much story and too many failed attempts at exercising, this gets a man for the power of super dark nuns showing women can do shit priests can do, but do it better.

[00:35:55] Yeah, dark nuns. It's I don't really disagree with anything you're saying. The two nuns are very good in it. It's a well acted movie. It looks good. Yeah. It's just got so many sections that are just so, so, so boring. It moves along at a snail's pace, which is fine for me typically.

[00:36:24] But there's just, I don't know. This movie just did not land for me. It's still a good movie to look at. I'm not unhappy I saw it. It's not a rage, but it's just a meh. It didn't help that you missed the first, you came in with a bad attitude. I did, yeah. I missed the first 12 minutes of the movie. I did come in with not the best attitude. I missed 12 minutes because I was caught in traffic.

[00:36:51] It was just, I gave myself a whole half hour to get there that should have taken me about 10 minutes. It's winter. Well, no, there was an accident. That happens in winter. Yeah, well. It really wasn't icy or anything out that day. All the people are stupid drivers. It's true. People are stupid. At any rate, yeah, this was meh. Yeah, I'm sorry. Like, don't give me crack. It was just one crack.

[00:37:20] You don't need crackling. You and your crackling. There's so much need for crackling. There's a time and a place for crackling. There was crackling need. It doesn't always have to be crackling. I don't know. I'm going to, and there we're going to disagree. Fair enough. If I'm going to be wanting a demon or a ghost, if I don't get my crackling, I'm not too happy. Yeah, fair. Unless I got, you know, the alternative, which is. What's the alternative? Russell Crowe and a scooter. Oh, yeah. Well, that makes up for all other evils. That's right.

[00:37:58] Scooter Yowie. All right. So becoming Led Zeppelin. So imagine learning about your first band crush at the same time as seeing actual concert footage with an audio commentary by all of the band, Murray. Even the ones that aren't alive anymore. Yeah. They brought them back from the dead. Brought them back from the dead. That's some good CGI. It's archive stuff. It's archive stuff. Yeah. But it fits so well into the movie. Yeah.

[00:38:27] Where you see humble, funny, talented artists who were, in my opinion, and still is the greatest rock and roll band that has ever lived. Well, that's it in a nutshell. This movie's awesome. But I'm going to tell you a little bit more. All right. So, but on top of that, seeing it in IMAX where you feel you are actually back in time at their concerts, mixed in with images of what's happening in the world at the time

[00:38:56] every step of their career is happening up until the release of their second album. Because why is that, you ask? Why did they only go up to the second album? Because this is becoming Led Zeppelin and not Led Zeppelin, the documentary. When I left the cinema, I was guessing there was going to be a part two because it just ends Led Zeppelin II in 1970. There's so much more. There's so much more.

[00:39:25] Like Complete Unknown where they go up to the part where Bob Dylan is like super famous and then they just end it? Yeah. That's it. But no. And there is no plan for a part two. So you better get your fill on this one. And you may think to yourself as you're watching this. So be prepared that you're going to be going, oh, this when I'm looking at my watch and I'm going, wait a minute, we're almost two hours into this. We haven't even hit Led Zeppelin II. Yeah.

[00:39:54] Like how long is this movie going to be? I'm like, how are they going to crush through the rest of this? I was like, I was thinking, is this a four hour movie? Did I forget that? Well, once they got to the point where they were talking about Led Zeppelin II and we were well over 90 minutes in, I was like, okay, this is where it's going to end. What's the title again? Because it's called Becoming Led Zeppelin. Yes, exactly. So yeah.

[00:40:17] So they basically, it's all the way up until their first basically major United States tour. Yep. Not the little club thing they did on Led Zeppelin I. Did you notice in the credits they played Edmonton on their first album? Yep. And Vancouver? Yep. I'm like, what the hell? Yeah. Oh my God. They didn't even play Toronto. They played Edmonton and Vancouver. They hit the West, sort of. Yeah, sort of.

[00:40:46] So yeah, this may be the greatest concert original doc about any band of all time. I never wanted this to end and then it did, which made me sad because I was loving seeing these guys see video clips of themselves. Oh, their reactions. Even they had never seen. There's the director of this got captured footage that the bandmates themselves and seeing the absolute joy on their faces as they went through this journey with us, the listeners

[00:41:16] and the viewers was enough to make anybody. So I just have to say, It was in the darkest depths of Mondo. I met a band so fair. Yes. But Gollum and the evil one crept up and slipped away with him. Them. Them. Them. It's Mondo.

[00:41:45] I got an unpacking, but I want to hear what you have to say about this first. So disclaimer, this becoming Led Zeppelin is a movie for Led Zeppelin fans. Oh, yeah. It's not a biography of, you know, there's all sorts of, you know, nasty things that have happened and the dirt trying to dig up the dirt on them, which so many documentaries do.

[00:42:15] This is just about where they came from musically. It's all about the music. It's not about anything but the music. So if you're looking for like little things about their personal lives and they touch upon things just because it's part of what brought them to be what they were. Yeah. But there's nothing in depth about anything that was going on. There's somebody else can make that documentary. Yeah. That's not what this is.

[00:42:45] This is a complete celebration of this amazing band, how they got to where they were, what they were influenced by that first. I mean, I was hooked in that first 20 minutes where they're going over like all the bands that they influence them. Everything was just so good and so well put together. And as you say, those reaction shots of them watching themselves with footage that they've never seen was amazing.

[00:43:13] That scene at the end where John Bonham, they kind of play how he felt about the band and everything. They were getting so emotional and they'd never heard that before. And it was just, it was so good. It got me emotional. I loved every minute of this movie and the music, not only the Zeppelin, but all the music

[00:43:38] that was in this because there's so much, not just Led Zeppelin, it's just a, it's a celebration of this band. It's a celebration of their influences. It is such an amazing movie. Seeing it in IMAX, it's the only way to see it. Please, please, please go out and watch this movie. It is totally. If you're a Led Zeppelin fan. If you're a Led Zeppelin fan. And if you're not, I still think that you'll dig it.

[00:44:06] I think, but if you're a Led Zeppelin fan, you're going to go gaga for this. It was so good. This is the test. So my wife does like Led Zeppelin. Right. And she was so into the music for the first hour and 20 minutes. Yeah. And then she hit a wall and she's like started whining and complaining a little bit. And I'm just like, can you please not talk? I'm so into this space right now. I am still into this. Because she's like, how much longer is this going to be?

[00:44:35] And I'm like, I'm hoping it's another four hours. Like, I just want it to last for the rest of my life. That's funny that you say that. Because I went to it with Kim. And I think she was getting fatigue towards the last half hour. Which is a good measurement, right? But she was also, I mean, she likes Zeppelin. How do you not? But she's not a huge fan like I am. And I know. And she's like, well, it was pretty good for a talking headstock. So, you know. It's like talking heads. Well, it's more than that.

[00:45:04] I've never seen more music. Like that. How many live concert footages did we see of that? Yeah. Right? It was also cool. Like we saw how many different versions of Ramble On. Which was fine by me. Absolutely. I was like, let's play another version of Ramble On. I'm perfectly happy with that. Absolutely. So, yeah. But it was, even if you're not a fad, you will enjoy it. You might get a little fatigued towards the end, apparently. I don't know how because it was amazing. I also was like, man, I wish this would just keep on going.

[00:45:34] I wish it wasn't becoming Led Zeppelin. I wish it was just Led Zeppelin. All is Led Zeppelin. Yeah. You know what to do, Murray. Mondo! Okay. So here's a question for you. All righty. What is your favorite Led Zeppelin album? And don't say Koda. It's not Koda.

[00:45:59] My favorite Led Zeppelin album is probably Led Zeppelin 2. I think that's where there was a little more experimentation in that album than there was on the other ones. And everything worked. Like everything on that album worked for me. Not that everything didn't work with the other ones, but like it really worked for me. I love, love, love Led Zeppelin 2. Yeah. For me, it's Houses of the Holy. That's fair.

[00:46:28] I mean, that's the thing is someone will say to you, this is my favorite Led Zeppelin. Hey, I don't care if you tell me. As long as you don't say Koda, I'm okay with it. Even if you say In Through the Outdoor, I can accept that. Yeah. Because that's the end of the road. You know what? But I think universally, I think most people say four. Oh, everybody loves Black Dog, Serving to Heaven. Yeah. That's why. That's why. But yeah, no, two for me.

[00:46:55] And the thing is that shook me on this was just how humble the band is. Like hearing Robert Plant go, oh, I was homeless. Yeah. You know, and like you hear these stories from it. Everything was from their heart. Yeah. Except Jimmy Page, who's still pretty full of himself. Yeah. Jimmy Page is always full of himself. But that's Jimmy Page. And you know what? He's Jimmy Page. He's allowed to be. He's Jimmy freaking Page. So he could be exactly. He's absolutely allowed to be full of himself. If he says.

[00:47:22] Because he's one of the most influential guitar players that's ever been. Yeah. I mean, that's the thing, though, is that up until two. Yeah. I mean, he pretty much did all the writing. Yeah. Right. And then it wasn't until Plant got his voice. Yeah. That. And who isn't glad that that happened? Yeah. Well, and even in two, Plant started to write the lyrics of a lot of few of the songs there. Yeah. Yeah. Like deepest steps of mortar. Mm hmm. All right.

[00:47:50] So the capper on this, number six. Six movie of the week. With a bullet. Yeah. He's still with us. Which Bryce says is also a love story. Absolutely. So this. The love story about the love of Winnipeg. Exactly. Winnipeg. So this takes place in the beautiful city of Winnipeg, which I was lucky enough to live in for eight years in my youth. Yeah. I'm going to, I was going to say you would probably have even more of an appreciation

[00:48:20] for this movie than I, because you probably recognize. Well, you, you've heard me laughing. Oh, I know. When Salisbury house came on. I was like, I was like, I don't know what that is. Nobody would even know what that is unless you lived or been to Winnipeg. Yeah. It's, it's a, it's a fast food chain in Winnipeg called Salisbury house that has not made it out of Winnipeg. I think it may be still in Manitoba, but the fact that they put the Salisbury house logo in there was enough to just go. Yeah.

[00:48:49] You guys know what the fuck you're doing. Yeah. Just bring you to a little bit of that little bit of extra joy. Cause there's so much. Well, and then the, okay, let me get to this. I'm just so excited about this movie. This takes place in the beautiful city of Winnipeg and was founded by Murray's favorite hero of Canadian history, Louis Riel, 150 years ago.

[00:49:11] And where everybody speaks Farsi or French and everything is printed in Farsi where the districts are separated by interesting colors like brown, beige and the gray district. The gray district. Yep. That's Winnipeg where there's stores that sell just Turkey and Turkey gravy or the Kleenex

[00:49:36] store and where chickens and turkeys run free through the icy cold streets of Winnipeg. This was a comedy. This was so much more than a comedy. You can't even explain this as a comedy and old Dutch chips and nutty club can be found on every single corner. And we get whole stores dedicated to them.

[00:50:01] We get the Salisbury house sighting, which to me was the icing on the cake or should say icing on the Salisbury house donut at four in the morning, uh, with it's patented Farsi written logos. Cause all written signs in Winnipeg are in Farsi and the currency Murray in Winnipeg is in Riels, the total currency of Winnipeg. All that being said, the story is simple.

[00:50:31] It's about a man who decides one day to live Montreal and make a move back to Winnipeg where he can go visit his mom. Along the way, we're introduced to a wild cast of characters who are all connected through either school or Tim Hortons and all support each other in a community that takes care of each other. That's all true.

[00:50:53] We realized by the end that family is the people we are part of in our community and not your birth family. And that along the way we laughed and felt joy and were part of this parody of our culture in ways that has never been done before, but still had enough for everyone who sees this film feels included and understood.

[00:51:19] And just like most films that are shot and produced in Winnipeg, this Farsi French Winnipeg movie that seems to poke fun at Alberta all the time as being the capital of Winnipeg is the most Mondo film I've seen in this week. I didn't think I could love a movie more than I've seen this movie. This is definitely making my top 10 for next year. Wow. I could watch this a hundred times. Maybe it's because I've been in Winnipeg. I think you've got a greater appreciation.

[00:51:49] Now, don't get me wrong. I also love this movie, but I think you love it that much more because of that time. If you live there. Because if you live there, there's going to be stuff that's going to be so much funnier to you than it was to me because I don't know what it's like. Yes, like there's scenes in there like I know where that is. And they put this monument to Louis Riel in the middle of the highway where people can go. I'm pretty sure it doesn't exist. It doesn't exist.

[00:52:18] And that's the whole thing about this movie. First off, the currency in Winnipeg is Canadian dollars, not Riel's. This is the most inventive, just insane movie that I've ever watched in my life. It's just, it is just like, how did you even come up with this concept to make this movie? And every character in it is like so affectionately crafted. Yeah. Every single character in it. The kids. The kids and the teachers.

[00:52:48] Oh my God. Just so much fun. He punishes the kids, Marie, by sticking them in a closet. He's like everybody in the closet. Because the one kid, the one kid broke his glasses and couldn't read. So he's punishing the entire class by forcing them to go sit in the closet. Oh my God. It's, this was so much fun. I laughed and I laughed and I laughed some more. And I didn't see quite the cohesiveness that you did.

[00:53:16] But as you're explaining the whole movie to me, I'm like, you know what? Jim's right. That is exactly what this whole thing is about. It's about community. It's about all these things. It's about coming together. And it's just an amazing, amazing film. I loved it. It is Mondo. It, as I say, now I wish that I also lived in Winnipeg for a few years. So I could have got all the references. You know what? You can just go there. But there was enough there that it was just so much fun.

[00:53:46] Well, here's the thing is that we're Canadian, right? So you can't help but feel a lot of the inferences in it, right? Like everybody knows Nutty Club and everybody knows Old Dutch Chips. Old Dutch Chips. That's all they ate was Old Dutch Chips. Out of the box. Out of the box. The twin packs. And so, Marie, just so you want to know what a double-double is in the Farsi Tim Hortons, is tea with more tea. A double dose. They pour the tea from a pot.

[00:54:13] And then, you know, those giant Arabic teapots that like are massive. And that's where you get a double-double because you're getting a double dose of tea. I love this movie. It's so funny. So it's a comedy, but it's also so dry. It's the dry. Yeah, it is completely. So it is bone freaking dry. And it's so funny. Oh, man, it's good. Yeah, you can press some buttons.

[00:54:48] I just, I've never seen a movie like it. And that's what was so lovely about it, too, is I've literally never ever seen a movie. And it is. And it's just, it's the most original thing that I've seen in a long, long time. Next to Dogman. Dogman. Oh, baby. Yeah, I really didn't have anything planned this week. I must have watched something. No, I had nothing I wanted to talk about.

[00:55:19] Absolutely nothing. But much like Bryce, I'm just like, you know, making it up as I go. All right. Nice. Because in a couple days is that most vile of holidays, unless you actually are married to someone, even if you are. Valentine's Day. It's also vile if you're married. I don't celebrate Valentine's Day. I can't stand it. Outside of the chocolate, maybe. Chocolate's gross. So I'm gonna... Made with cow excretions. There's vegan chocolate.

[00:55:47] Throw out a list of movies that will definitely make you not feel like you're in love. Ooh. Or like the anti-Valentine's Day. So let's start with my boy Ryan, who's in a couple of these. Who's Ryan? Blue Valentine. I like that movie. This is without the question Ryan Gosling's saddest movie. It's a good movie. Unless you like watching people fight. I do.

[00:56:15] And the destruction of a real relationship just disintegrate in front of your eyes. Yes, that's enjoyable to me. It's not a good date movie. What are you talking about? But yeah, it's... But yeah, and it's just soul crushing to watch what happens. So yeah. I only had to see it once. I thought it was uplifting. And we got Fatal Attraction, 1987. I don't like that movie. Bunnies and Boiling Water.

[00:56:42] Isn't there a thing where she unspreads her legs and you see her vajayjay? No. That's... That's fatal... Fatal... Basic instinct. That's basic instinct. No, this is the one where... I think they came out within like a week of each other. Exactly. No. They didn't. I think they did. Yeah. So Michael Douglas basically fools around on his wife and suffers the consequences. Because his lover decides to boil the kid's bunny. Nice. Yeah. It's... Is that code for something?

[00:57:12] Makes you think twice about cheating on your spouse, I'm guessing. Get my bunny boiled. And we got... Bryce's greatest actor of our generation. In Gone Girl. Yeah. David Fincher. And yeah. My girl Rosamund. Who basically just... She's just... Nasty in this. She's chewing up the screen. Chewing up the screen. I never watched it because, you know, Affleck's in it.

[00:57:41] But I've heard... And I do remember there's a scene where she's having sex with Neil Patrick Harris, who I'm pretty sure was gay. Or I think she stabs him in the middle of it with an ice pick or something. So yeah. It's not a nice movie. Okay. Let's go on to... Ex Machina. Yeah. Because, you know, if you can't find the love of your life, you just make one. That's right.

[00:58:06] Oscar Isaac, who basically designs his dream girl in the Ascension Robot. And then, of course, Don Lugleeson shows up and is a little curious and, you know, shit happens. It's definitely the Valentine's Day to remember. Then we have Mr. Phoenix. The one who's still alive. Nice. In her. The most talented one. In her. Oh, not her. I liked her. Spike Jones. Nothing wrong with her. So basically, Joaquin Phoenix is such a loser.

[00:58:36] He buys an in-ear operating system to talk to, you know. And it happens to be Scarlett Johansson. So they talk to each other around the clock and they have a really creepy Bluetooth sex scene, even though she's just a voice. What's a Bluetooth sex scene? She's not there. She's a voice. He's wearing a thing in his ear. Yeah, that's phone sex. Yeah.

[00:59:04] And, yeah, you couldn't do this list without another Ryan Gosling movie, Lars and the Real Girl. That's a good film. That's a good film. That's an awesome movie. But, yeah, he's a sweet, lovable guy who treats a mannequin like his girlfriend. And everybody around him has to kind of indulge him with that. She's pretty sweet. But, yeah, he was pretty sad. She's hot. Super hot. She was hot. All right.

[00:59:30] And we'll finish up with Closer. Closer. It's got Natalie Portman and Jude Law and Clive Owen and Jim Roberts in it. Yeah, yeah. That's excellent, by the way. Yeah. It's set in London. And basically, they all want to be in love. But they get slayed to their vulnerabilities and they, you know, screw things up. So, yeah. Boo on Valentine's Day. That's my theme.

[01:00:00] Boo. Boo. Good. Do a good. Temperature. Carol Kane impression. Vision. Blurring. Rage. Taking. Over.

[01:00:32] Okay. Rages of the Past. So, I saw five movies this week. Bryce saw six. Mm-hmm. And I saw them on different days of the week. Monday, we saw three. So, I saw one, we saw it on which day was that, Mary? Sunday? Saw it on Sunday.

[01:00:59] And the other one we saw on Friday night. And let me tell you, if you added up all the audience from all five of those movies, not including me or the person I went with, there was what? Even Zeppelin? Yeah. Even Zeppelin. There was not more than 20 people combined. Oh, there was a Zeppelin.

[01:01:26] There was like, it had to be 40 or 50 easy. When you went. Yeah. Yeah. When I went, when I went, there was three of us. That's crazy. In the IMAX. What? Yeah. Yeah, mine was pretty crowded. Yeah. So, I'm heartbroken. You know? Yeah. Pun intended, being Valentine's. That, you know, we can get a million people to go see all this crap.

[01:01:54] And this was probably, whether you liked them or not, I'm going to just look at this. This was a week where we had one, two, three, four, five, six movies. Not one of them is a sequel, a rewrite, or a redo. That's true. It's all six original films. That's actually kind of amazing. Yeah. It is amazing. It's almost unheard of. And this is where nobody shows up for it. Yeah. Exactly. So, that's my rage. Finally, there's a weekend worth going to the movies.

[01:02:23] There'll be 10 billion people for next week. Oh, yeah. It's going to be ridiculous. Yeah, I don't even want to talk about it. I don't even want to watch that stupid movie. But Harrison Ford is a Hulk. Yeah, wonderful. By the way, that's the other thing. They shouldn't have put that in the trailer. Yeah. They should have left that as a mystery. Remember the first trailer where all you saw was the big red Hulk leg? Yes. And that was it. They didn't inference that Harrison Ford was going to become the Hulk.

[01:02:51] They didn't touch upon that at all. That should have been the only trailer. And it was a cool trailer because it didn't look like the other ones with the stupid lines coming down. Yeah. It looked really good. And then they went and they just got it. Well, let's just tell the whole freaking movie. Well, you know why they did that? This is my guess on that. Yes. So we can add this on as a second rage. Is that they do shit like that because they're like, you know what? Everybody loves Harrison Ford. Remember? Remember the member berries?

[01:03:21] Yeah. Remember? You remember? Well, you can show Harrison Ford as the president. The first trailer had wall-to-wall Harrison Ford in it. But nothing that had anything to do with him turning into the red Hulk. Now he's a superhero. And here's a bigger question that I have. Harrison Ford is in his 80s. Where he's probably close to getting Alzheimer's or dying of something because he's old. And you're going to write him into a franchise that's just starting out again.

[01:03:50] So unless Red Hulk dies, it's going to be like, what? Why wouldn't you put somebody as Red Hulk who's like in their 40s? Maybe the Ruffalo shows up and they didn't want to show that. You know what? I don't even care what happened. They should not have released it or shown us that in the trailers. It's stupid. It's another Disney superhero movie. Poop fest.

[01:04:11] My rage is Red Hulk. No. My rage is the same as, I don't know, probably a couple of weeks ago.

[01:04:41] I am just sick of stuff that doesn't warrant being in an AVX. In an AVX. I stopped gouging me for an extra $5 for no reason. Heart Eyes was very entertaining. But I did not need to see it in AVX. There is no reason that it should have been in that theater. There's enough on right now. Even a really, like, even one of the animated movies that are out there. That would make more sense to put in AVX.

[01:05:08] Any of the, you know, big, I don't know what, there's got to be a ton of stuff that's on right now that can go in AVX. Heart Eyes did not need to be in AVX. So that's, it's just ridiculous. I'm tired of getting gouged for an extra $5 for no reason. It's poopy. Can't wait to watch Captain America in AVX. At IMAX in 3D. Let's hope it's in 3D. No 3D. Breach. Subsiding.

[01:05:39] Anger. Anger fading. Fading. And in Rumble Seats. That'll be awesome. Even better. Yep, for the 3DX. Yeah, with X as well. Let's put everything in there. Yeah, Screen X. Yeah, Screen X. VIP.

[01:05:58] Last time on Rage or Dare, the boys visited the candy shop and scooped a heaping helping from the merman's ice-creamy bucket of rage when they pulled the 2012 Canadian film Recoil. This week, it's Bryce's turn to Rage or Dare. And yes, it is your turn, Bryce. I don't think so. Check the schedule. Come on, Bryce.

[01:06:22] Let's check in with the crew and see if Machete and Steve Austin can put together an action-packed CN Tower of a movie. Or if this film will have our boys recoiling in rage. Wink, wink. Okay. Do you want me to talk about this first? Ah, go ahead. All right. So, recoil. Recoil, recoil.

[01:06:53] So, right away, I'm totally dialed in as Steve Austin throws this hunter off a 10-foot cliff. Yeah. That kills him. Yes. It wasn't a 10. It was more than 10 feet. If it was 10, it was a lot. Plus, he threw him off it with a, you know, no force. He kind of just dropped him. He just kind of drops him. Yeah. But he landed funny. It happened. Had he survived, did he want to went down and killed him? I don't know if that would happen. So, people are going to die easily in this movie is what I thought.

[01:07:23] Okay. If it only takes a 10-foot cliff. Right? I guess. So, Machete's in a gang that has the gang's name on their leather jackets. Yeah. And the city they live in, Hope. Right. It was so they know where to return to, I guess. Like, how many motorcycle gangs do you know that have the city that they live in? I don't know. Maybe I don't know motorcycles, but it's like- That's a thing.

[01:07:51] Yeah, I'm pretty sure Hell's Angels has the name of their city. Yeah. Yeah. Yep. Okay. Whatever. It's a thing. It looked dumb on their leather jackets. And apparently when Steve makes it to the fine city of, and I think it's Hope, British Columbia, but he makes an enemy of Machete and his gang friends, I guess I want to say. Where he lays punishment down by making people fight him.

[01:08:17] Where he uses superhero strength to teach them lessons. I don't know about superhero strength. He's just a strong guy. And then lets them go. Well, not all of them. Not all of them. Just the ones that he didn't want to kill, I guess. So, as I'm watching this, Machete isn't even really a bad guy. Steve kills Machete's brother for some reason. Machete is a bad guy. He wasn't that bad. Whatever. He says to him, you know why I'm here?

[01:08:47] But, of course, we have no idea why he's here. So, he ties him to a car anyway and runs him to a building, which blows up before the car actually gets to the building. Because he's a sleazeball. Yeah. So, yeah. But he hadn't killed anybody else up until that point. Just him. We get no explanation. Were you not watching the movie? I watched the whole movie. We totally got an explanation. No, well, later we got the explanation. But up until that point, we had no explanation. Do you need to be spoon-fed everything? A little bit. This is a complex intellectual piece of cinema, Jim. Okay. Yeah.

[01:09:16] That's what I missed. So, anyway, the car blows up before it even gets to the building. That was a little weird. So, I'm guessing maybe because there was a landmine in the parking lot. Then the gang instinctively knows he's dead and shows up. It was just too expensive to film it again. You know what? I have a feeling that he might be there. So, the gang all shows up. Yeah. Along with the sheriff who's afraid of Machete because he's Machete's bitch, obviously. Yeah.

[01:09:44] The best thing about all this is how totally believable Steve Austin's acting is. I was stone cold with surprise of how well he acts. I mean- I'm trying to decide if you're being sarcastic right now. So, no. Sorry. I mean, sorry. Not act. But the words I want to say is he says words in scenes. That's what I want to say. He's not actually acting for the whole movie. So, you weren't blown away by his acting. I was stone cold with surprise.

[01:10:14] Oh, man. You're being rough on this movie. No, wait. The best thing in this was the grocery store and where every can on the shelf is turned around. I was thinking this town's residents like to guess what they're buying as opposed to knowing what they're buying. Or maybe they just didn't have enough money to show the Campbell suit cans in their movies. So, anyway. Back to Machete. He doesn't kill Steve Austin after he kills his brother because he might be an undercover cop.

[01:10:43] Which makes no sense because he's already got the cops in his back pocket. He used to be an undercover cop. Yeah. So, and Steve sticks around to I think he can lay down some stone cold justice when his original plan was to kill a couple of people, which he did, and then leave. Thank God he sticks around. He wrestles a few guys, apparently one at a time, and then they find him. He teams up with the one good cop. Gets sort of sexy, kinda, with a female cast member.

[01:11:11] Does a cage match at a bar. Then lights a guy on fire that the feds show up into Canada, I guess. A gang war starts, but a gang, I mean Steve Austin. Even though it was filmed there. Yeah. Steve Austin against the Hope Circle Gang, which is a great name for a gang. They capture Steve. Why? Circle of Hope. I didn't understand. Circle of Hope. Because that was dumb. Some other dumb stuff happens, which made no sense. Steve deals justice.

[01:11:41] Stone cold justice, by the way. Yes. Fights Machete to the death, and everybody lives happily ever after. Yes. Except Machete, apparently. So, this was another walking tall ripoff with horrible acting by Steve. Totally a walking tall ripoff. But some great acting by Machete. No. No. But. That's a weak spot of this. If you like made for TV, Canadian, horrible, rage-filled films, then with a terrible score,

[01:12:11] this would be a nice creamy treat for you. It was cold. Stone cold. Ice cold. Stone cold rage. This movie was so horrible. I hated everything about it. I can't believe that you hated it this much. What is wrong with you? You know what? You go in thinking you're going to hate a movie. Like, I went in and I'm like, oh God, this is going to be awful. And it was. And I'll tell you. And then you're like, well, maybe Danny Trejo can save it, right? Because he's Danny Trejo.

[01:12:42] But Danny Trejo isn't the reason that this movie was enjoyable to me. In fact, I kind of wish Danny Trejo wasn't in it because he took away from some of the enjoyment that I had because I expect more from him. I was disappointed in his performance. But I was entertained for the most part. And I think Steve Austin, he could easily be an action star. He is the worst actor ever. He is not. He was just fine.

[01:13:11] Have you seen Hulk Hogan? Anything? Yeah. No. Austin was fine. The movie was completely unoriginal. But it was. That's horrible. It was laughably unoriginal. No, it was not so funny. Bad, it's funny. It wasn't so bad as funny. No, but it did have some entertaining bits in it. I wasn't. I mean, at the end of the day, yes, the movie's garbage. But it's not as bad as you're saying it is. No, it's worse. It's not worse.

[01:13:41] I can't believe you had more enjoyment in this than Love Hurts. I did have more enjoyment in this than Love Hurts. Don't get me wrong. They're both rages. But Love Hurts is a way bigger rage than this. No. I did not hate this movie as much as I thought I was going to. I just hated it a little bit, which still makes it a rage. But I thought Steve Austin was fine. He's horrible. I thought there were some bits in it that were funny. I actually laughed a couple of times.

[01:14:10] A couple of times, probably unintentionally. They didn't really want me to laugh at those parts. There was a couple of times. But there were some intentional laughs as well. It's not the worst thing that I've ever heard or seen or heard. It is, however, not good. And it's still a rage. But it's not as bad as you're making it out to be. No, it's horrible. This movie was so bad. And I don't understand. Well, maybe. Maybe it's because I don't understand in general. We both agree, sort of. But I just don't think it was. I think you're a little too hard on it. No, Steve.

[01:14:40] And Austin is fine. Austin could be in a. I would watch Steve Austin in an action movie. He's fine. He's like. He was not the problem with this movie. Well, there's a lot of problems. You know what action movie he was in? What's that? The Expendable. Yeah, that's garbage. He's just saying he was in that. Yeah. And he was probably fine in it, too. But I don't even remember. He's not fine in anything. Unless he's in a wrestling ring. He's just fine. This first thing I ever liked. Anyways, it doesn't matter. It was a rage. It sucked. Let's move on.

[01:15:08] You can pull from my juicy bag of deliciousness. Okay. So, I believe. It's hard to read this. I think it says Escape from the Planet of the Apes. Yes. The original series. Bryce's favorite. Okay. Good old Chuck. If you like Planet of the Apes as much as I like Planet of the Apes.

[01:15:37] If memory serves me correct, this isn't exactly like the other ones. It's different. It's different. It is different. Yeah. Okay. Escape from the Planet of the Apes. Because they're escaping from the Planet of the Apes. That whole series is poo-poo. So, I can't wait to watch another installment of it. Another poo-poo? Especially one that's like smack dab in the middle where I'm not going to know what the hell's going on anyways. No. You won't know any. That'll be good. I hope there's some explanation in it so that I'm not completely lost. Oh, yeah.

[01:16:07] There's always the catch-up. I guess at the end of the day, I know the basic story, so I shouldn't be lost anyways. There's the Apes takeover from the planet. And you have to escape. And then you have to escape. And then they kill you. They had to escape. Yes. Which makes perfect sense. If you're confused, watch the Mark Wahlberg one first. Yeah, I already had to do that there. You had to do that last year, actually. That explains everything watching him. It absolutely explains everything. Because you love Mark Wahlberg.

[01:16:37] Don't we all? Don't love Mark Wahlberg. That's incorrect. Oh, well, thanks, Ragers, for listening. Thanks to the extended Film Rage family, who you can find in our show notes. Thanks to Casey from the Nerdy Photographer for the voice of Rager Dare. Find us on social media everywhere at FilmRageYYC. Check out everything Film Rage at FilmRageYYC.com, including our merch site for Redbubble and TeePublic. We're always putting things on sale, so buy some merch. We always want to make this raging blast for all listeners, so please comment, like, and subscribe.

[01:17:06] And send us emails to FilmRageCalgary at gmail.com. Dare to see terrible movies to fuel our rage. But no matter what you do, please, please, please, please, please, please make us a rage. That's it for this week. Rage on! Rage on!