Godfather Producer Robert Evans Biopics: The Kid Stays in the Picture (2002) and The Offer (2022)

[00:00:00] This podcast is a production of Unfiltered Studios. If you would like to know more about joining Unfiltered Studios, please visit our website at unfpod.com for more information. So what was it like to work with like Bob Evans? I mean... Oh, he was the best. Nobody's better than Bob. Nobody. He looked like a brilliant, brilliant businessman. He was brilliant. He was so brilliant in so many ways. I mean, I miss him so much because there's so many people who are going to work with.

[00:00:29] There were so many things that come up on a daily basis that I would be like, Evans, you're not going to believe this. Or Evans, what do you think about this? Or Evans, what would you do? Or Evans, these are my two choices. And he would always point me in the right direction. And there was nothing that I ever called him with that he said... He had experienced everything. He had experienced every single thing.

[00:00:58] That there was nothing like... These guys asked me if they could use his name on a movie poster for Sundance Film Festival. Just one poster for like a day or two and that would be it. And we found out that they were using his name in the boiler room.

[00:01:21] So I had to go and have a big fight with this guy who I won't mention his name, but he's already been to prison a bunch of times. And I had to go and pull Bob's name off of it like a bobcat. Get his name off the picture. Because people love to use his name because of The Godfather and Love Story and China Town and all of True Grit and Rosemary's Baby and Harold and Maude.

[00:01:50] And all these incredible movies that he did. And when I went to him, because I was scared to tell him, because it came through the guys that I put in the... That I said, let's help this guy out. Yeah. Let's go your name on this. And it was just... He already had been there, done that, had the t-shirt, the sweatshirt, the hat. Like it was...

[00:02:19] His name had been used by a bunch of other people over the years. Yeah. Just users and taking advantage of them. And he was just the greatest human being and he loved work. He was obsessed with development and projects and work and stuff like that. Even as he got older, he worked till his last breath. Wow. Yeah, it's what a shame he passed away. But a great guy. Big playboy. He loved the ladies.

[00:02:48] And the ladies loved Bob. Yeah, he seemed very charming. I never had the pleasure of meeting him. At one time, I had a friend that said, Hey, Bob's putting together a tennis match. Can you fill in because someone dropped out. And I couldn't get there in time. And I regretted not changing it. Because to play tennis with him, to actually meet that man... I know. Oh, it would have been amazing. I know.

[00:03:16] He gave up tennis later on in life when he got older. Yeah. And it killed him. Yeah. He really... And he would have Daryl on the tennis courts, his tennis pro. Do you know Daryl? No, I didn't know Daryl. Um, and Daryl, uh, would bring in all these major players that he would coach. And they would all come in and meet Bob and talk to Bob. And he was always so thrilled. Uh...

[00:03:45] We missed. We loaded. We edited. We edited. Sometimes we get so deep into conversation that we have separate segments worthy of their own place in the sun. Here is a reshuffled mini episode. Gilded is homework and actually watched the Making of mini series.

[00:04:14] So yeah, I can work that in. Yeah, we can talk a bit about the Making of documentaries about producer Robert Evans. He has been both the toast of this town and he's been an outcast in Hollywood. The legendary producer who made Superstars and crashed and burned. A movie making life few people have led, but it didn't come easy. It was the beginning of the golden era of a new Hollywood. And me? I was lucky to be part of it. My name is Robert Evans. Stardom found him. Big splash.

[00:04:43] New York businessman dives into pool and comes out movie star. Hollywood seduced him. Where does the next actor and a bad one at that come out running a studio? Success defined him. Godfather. Paramount didn't want to make the film. I think there were more pregnancies over a love story than any film ever made. Chinatown? First draft of the script. Nobody understood it. USA Films presents the story of a man. You keep seeing pictures of you with gorgeous women. Are they important in your life?

[00:05:13] Who ruled over a revolution. You live a lot of people's dream. Is it as good as it looks? If you live by the sword, no damn world you could die by it. And when it all came crashing down. I've been shot down, bloody, recused, threatened, disgraced, betrayed. No one wanted me in the picture. Rose to his feet again. Tough? You bet it is. But I ain't complaining. Nothing comes easy. The Kid Stays in the Picture.

[00:05:48] Listen here, Bob. Paramount is going to come crashing down. We need hits. You've read The Godfather, right? The Godfather? Sure. Who hasn't? We've been all over town. No one wants to make this movie. So I need you to produce it. Get going. I can't believe you told me you read it. You better read fast on the plane. Oh yeah, that's big. The Godfather is bringing us too many problems. You want me to take care of it?

[00:06:18] Gangster movies are dead. This is not just some gangster film. We need someone who understands the times. The gangster's Ford Coppola. He's got a great vision. We have to put this in the picture. The scene about gangsters arguing over sauce? No. The scene about family arguing over sauce. I got no cast. Do you think Pacino is actually a possibility? Cut it! No Pacino. Marlon Brando is interested. He's a nutcase.

[00:06:47] Can one thing go right with this picture? You want to make a movie that's going to make my people look like animals. And that ain't gonna happen. I respect what you're saying. And I think I have a solution to our problem. You're still gonna try and make this thing? I got no choice. I took a chance on you as you stabbed me in the back. I won't judge you if you need to walk away from this. I'm not running either.

[00:07:18] This is what it's all about. The excitement. The thrill. That's movie magic, baby. I was just gonna say when you think about it, because they didn't, the mafia didn't want that movie being made. No. No.

[00:07:48] Because it was basically an unofficial expose and the feds were like, kind of doing what people did years, decades later with video games. Oh my God, it's gonna glamorize it and our kids are gonna become mobsters. I'm like, it's just fiction guys mixed in with based off actual events. And then De Niro got bitched out by the Italians over it too. Well, the thing is the Italian American Association of America got really down on it. Yes, they did.

[00:08:16] Like, how can you say, you know, this is a, and you gotta think, okay, who's Italian in that? Okay, Coppola, Italian. Puzo, Italian. You know. It is interesting. It's like, you know. Yes, you might not like that image, but at the same time. James Caan, a Jew, but, but James Caan, Jewish, but an Italian, you know. And I mean, the fact that they wanted Martin Sheen and he was like, no, no, no, no. I'm not, I'm not Italian. And I'm not comfortable with this. Let's give it to Martin.

[00:08:45] He didn't even look really like a gangster at all, to be honest. Yeah, no. Well, they thought that of Pacino as well. I could see him as a cop, but yeah, he was like, give it to my buddy Pacino who, you know, missed out on other rules I got, you know. But they didn't want to use, yeah, they didn't want to use Pacino either because he was too short, they thought. Yeah. Too short. You want to talk describing the looks. They were like, they weren't even distracted by how handsome he looked back then. They're just like, yeah, you know, he hasn't done anything yet. I'm like, well, give him a chance. He's done. What have he done? He's done Panic at Needle Park.

[00:09:14] Panic at Needle Park and a few other minor movies. Yeah. Scarecrow. I think. So what you're saying is this is another role that got screwed, that somebody got screwed over and that somebody is Joe Estipens. Yeah. He wasn't acting yet, but I see what you did there. Has anyone else seen The Kid Stays in the Picture or The Offer TV miniseries? Yes. Yeah. I've seen The Kid that Stays in the Picture. It's interesting how. There's another movie out there.

[00:09:44] I'd be curious about that one. Yeah. The Kid Stays in the Picture. Yeah. Yeah. If I had a pick our crowning jewel, I'd say it was a 30 page treatment to a novel called Mafia written by Mario Piso. In turning treatment into a novel, Mario asked me if he could change the name to Godfather. Sure, why not? I never thought he would finish it anyway. Well, he finished it. It became the biggest book of the decade. There I was holding the whole diamond. Euphoria?

[00:10:14] Huh. Wrong. Paramount didn't want to make the film. Sicilian mobster films don't play. That's what these distribution guys had to say. And when you're bat zero, don't make another sucker bet. I'd corner Peter Bart at the studio late that night. What the fuck do we do? Peter shook his head, laughed. Heavens, we've got a problem. No, we don't. We've got to find a solution, Peter. It must have been after two in the morning, and we found it.

[00:10:44] Outside of red ink, every one of the films had another thing in common. They were written, directed, and produced. And usually starred. Jews, not Sicilians. There's a thin line, Peter, between a Jew and a Sicilian. We're going to make a picture that's going to be Sicilian to the core. You're going to smell the spaghetti. There was one problem. It's hard to believe. But in 1969, there wasn't a single Italian-American director.

[00:11:14] That's with any credibility. Bart looks at me and says, what about Coppola? Are you nuts? One thing for sure is he is. Bart snaps right back at me. Brigenthal. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's your esoteric bullshit coming out. Let's face it, Bart. This genius has made three pictures. You're a big boy now. It's a mojsy-fartsy kind of picture. But no business. Finian's Rainbow, which was a top Broadway musical, he made it into a disaster.

[00:11:43] And now he's got the rain people out there, which everyone's rained on. There's got to be someone else. Come on. There wasn't. But then there was another problem. Coppola didn't want to do it. This guy couldn't get a cartoon made in town. Yet he didn't want to make The Godfather. I got to give the guy credit. His convictions were strong. He didn't want to immortalize the families that lack his Italian heritage. After three long days of discussion with this guy, Peter's on the horn.

[00:12:13] Coppola makes the picture, on one condition. That it's not a film about organized gangsters. It's not about organized gangsters. It ain't a musical, Peter. I told you the guy's nuts. He has an idea, heavens, that's not bad. He wants to make it as a family chronicle a metaphor for capitalism in America. Fuck him and the horse he rode in on. He is nuts. Now get him out of here. Bob, I will if you want me to, but take ten steps first. Let's not forget he's Italian.

[00:12:42] I had less than 48 hours to make the decision. Sell it or shake hands with the devil. Coppola was announced as the Godfather's maestro. The shooting in The Godfather should take several months. And the picture is scheduled for a release sometime around Christmas 1971. So if in the next few months you see some old cars dashing around or about New York,

[00:13:07] or see a gentleman taking another gentleman somewhere at the point of a loaded gun, don't raise a hue and cry because it's only the filming of The Godfather. But then New Yorkers don't raise a hue and cry about that sort of thing anyway, do they? This is Gene Hebert, Fifth Avenue and 31st Street. It was the unveiling of Francis' cut of The Godfather. In the theater sat Francis with his quadrilla of assistants and editors and askesses,

[00:13:35] plus the rest of his production team were all there. The film was to open in four months, Paramount's big Christmas gift to the world. The lights went down, the picture started. Two hours and six minutes later the room began to fill with light. Francis, I want to speak with you alone. I was on fire. And the prince himself took a half hour to get to my office. Thanks for showing Francis.

[00:14:05] I couldn't tell but all my boys were telling me how great the picture is. They tell me not to touch a frame. The picture stinks, Francis. Got it? You shot a great film, where the fuck is it? In your kitchen with your spaghetti? It sure ain't on the screen. Where's the family, the heart, the feeling? Is that left of the kitchen too? Ooh, did cop the glare. Schmuck. Name me a studio head that tells the director to make a picture longer. Only a nut like me would. But you're gonna do it. You shot a saga, pal.

[00:14:35] But you turned in a trailer. Now go back and give me a movie. The next morning I told the New York honchos that the picture could not be ready for Christmas. I didn't need a phone to hear their screams. Coppola? Of course he agreed with them. You got it for Christmas, don't worry. Evans is crazy. He wants to change everything. Hear this. He wants me to make it longer. Then I get my orders. And unalterable.

[00:15:06] Evans, the picture is to be ready for Christmas. And that is it. Fine. I quit. A year before they would have booted me out of my ass. Yeah, but love story saved Paramount. And I was their fair-haired boy. And you've only got one shot. Either you pull down that beautiful brass ring, where they get them brass knuckles in the balls. You've got no second time around. To Francis and the entire company's chagrin,

[00:15:35] Blue Dawn backed me and backed me all the way. That was from 2002. It would come on Showtime quite a lot. And I would always forget that was part of Robert Evans, because I just read so many film history books. I just knew that he was a powerhouse producer for Paramount all these years until he wasn't. And it is just so funny how the offer... Some people are mixed. Some people didn't care for it. Other people liked it, but thought there was some miscasting.

[00:16:02] I personally had a lot of fun with it because it's just very entertaining if you're into film history. Yeah. But the casting of Matt Good as Bob Evans, not to be confused with the sausage, is like that's... He had it down to a T. How he talks, how he's charming one minute, and then a big, you know, you know what, the next. I'm trying to remember which one, Bob Evans, who played Bob Evans? Matt Good. You've seen him in movies like Watchmen.

[00:16:33] He's a British actor. Was he the... He's not the guy that played... He wasn't like Doctor Who or something, was he? No, he wasn't. Not to my knowledge. But yeah, I mean, I think the offer is going to be enjoyed by a lot of people, especially just the casting of Ali McGraw and Robert Redford and just some of the other... Dan Fogler as the comedian, as Coppola, I thought was... Oh, I heard he nailed Coppola to a T. He is just...

[00:17:02] He really made... I think movie geeks are going to really build something with it. They're like, ah, that's how I was in film school, you know? You bring up that guy that was in the first one who's trying to rehearse his lines before he goes before the dawn. Yeah, they do a little bit of drama. Yeah. Oh, yeah, I forgot. Yeah. Yes.

[00:17:29] And Tommy Bechtel, who's a comedian on here, he's one of the other bodyguards in that scene with the Ferrigno portrayer. And he had some funny stories about that whole scene. But yeah, Ferrigno really worked very well in that. Giovanni Ribisi as the other gangster guy with some influence showing them from the Italian union was a good subplot. Everybody's pretty unrecognizable. So, kudos to Adam Archen and crew for their direction of it. That is it.

[00:17:59] Like, I was unsure at first. I'm like, how are they going to wrap this up in a few episodes? But it was just very compelling from film buff circuit. Now, as a standalone thing, it also was working wonders. People were just seeing, again, just how the moodiness behind the scenes and making a movie. And I mean, if there's one complaint all the way, and it's not a knock against it, I wish they could have shown some other movies that were troubled by their time length.

[00:18:27] You know, before they could have explored Heaven's Gate and some of the other stuff that made studios finally say, you know, until Lord of the Rings came out, no more free hour epics ever. Yeah. Let's do another three hour epic. Right. What was Cleopatra a three hour epic? Yep. Cleopatra was bankrupted Fox. It really did. And, but. So yeah, the kid stays in the picture. It's totally ideal if you just want to get an overall sense of Evans. It is kind of funny though. What did they offer?

[00:18:57] No. No, Cleopatra bankrupted Fox. Oh yeah. Fast forward to after the pandemic, Top Gun Maverick brought it back. Was it three hours? No, that was only two hours. But given that Cleopatra bankrupted the movie studio in the past and Tom Cruise brought it back after the pandemic. That's amazing night and day. Oh, that was paramount. Yeah. But I see what you're meaning.

[00:19:26] It'd be a lot funnier if he, if he didn't do it, because then they could say he came up a little short. Oh, he is a short guy. Yeah. Here's what gets me the most is that I think Robert Evans, like had done like love story. Yes. I think he was. They do hit on that and everything. A lot. Yeah. They, they, they especially detail how he's like, I know Steve McQueen's, you know, having an affair with you. My, my love. Can I come in and have a word? She's like, no.

[00:19:56] She's like, well, I'll see you when you get back. So they do play up the whole womanizer side of them versus the charming side versus how the who do you think you're talking to producer antics that he does. Yeah. Who do you think you're talking to? Who do you think you're talking to? I'm Robert Evans. He's not a gangster in any way, but he might as well have been. I'm a great producer. I'm a guy who can produce anything. Give me a turn. I'll make it into a piece of gold. That's how I am. Oh yeah. I shit out gold, honey.

[00:20:23] Well, you know, you learn from the offer that Frank Sinatra was not a fan of the movie being made just because purely at least in the offer, it was just purely because of Johnny Fontaine's character. I didn't mind the actor they cast. He didn't sound exactly like Sinatra because that's hard to do, but he at least had the rhythm and body language down. So it was a decent try where he says, now this is what gets me right. Like my sister in law.

[00:20:51] Like if my thing is this a barometer of somebody or whatever they. Oh, I don't like the Godfather. Why? That's too violent. What do you want? You want flowers at each other? Jesus Christ. It's about hobsters. So, I mean, Lego the Godfather. They should totally do a Lego of the Godfather. I would be in heaven. I love the video game. It's called the Logfather. Logfather.

[00:21:19] You got your title right there. Yes. Curb Stomp with Sonny throwing roses at people. Yeah. But JJ, there's a funny reverse on that too. You didn't even want to direct the Godfather. You know, I carry on about the Godfather. You said that a moment ago about how he didn't want to direct the Godfather. No, you didn't. You didn't want to direct it. That's crazy. You thought the book was kind of crappy and that it would be impossible. Do you remember the book? A big part of the book. I love the book. Yeah, but half the book is about this lady who has this gynecological problem and the

[00:21:47] guy was going to operate on her and then he made love with her. I thought it was sort of sleazy. Yeah. And those days when I was young, I wanted to be like, you know, Fellini or write beautiful Godard and be an artist. So when we had this little company to do personal films with these younger guys who all became very famous, they would say, Francis, we've got to make some money. We're broke. They're going to chain up. The sheriff is going to chain the door. Do this book, you know, this gangster book.

[00:22:17] Just do what they want. Don't argue with them. Who approach you to do that? Paramount Pictures? Why do you think they chose you? Well, you know, oddly, when they first got the story, there had been two or three movies about like gangster mafia. There was one with Kirk Douglas called The Brotherhood and they were all flops. So all the big directors turned them down and they decided to make The Godfather very low budget and a young guy who, and I had been known as a screenwriter, so they figured they'd get a free rewrite.

[00:22:46] And then also I was Italian American, so they figured if it caught a lot of guff, they would say, well, he made it. So it was very unlikely that I would get that job. But looking at you, it's true. If you had won the Academy Award already for writing Patton, right? You had won that already. And so you think if you're a movie student, you say, hey, listen, maybe we can get this guy to direct it and he'll write it. That's right. We don't have to worry about that. They didn't have a good script. I remember the script. It was very hokey. You read the script. You said, this is awful.

[00:23:16] I can fix this. I'm going to sit and do it. And you were doing it strictly for money. True? I didn't want to do it because I wanted to make the conversation. I had written the script of the conversation and I was trying to get money for that. And did you say to them, if I'll direct this mafia movie for you, if you give me the financing for a conversation? Well, I wasn't even in a position game to say that. I mean, I mean, they finally really just needed him. It was George Lucas who said to me, Francis, we got to get some money in here. You're the only one who can make it.

[00:23:45] So they hire you to make this film and you're like, oh, this book. I mean, you had to sit there and read the book and figure out what the hell can I pull out of this thing. Then I came to admire greatly Mario Puzo. And when I met him, he was just the most, one neatest man, you know, and is so just simple and wise, you know. So I really, I really, really came to like him and admire him a lot. But then about that cast, how do you put together? Well, I was just going to make a point about that.

[00:24:13] What amazes me about you as a director is that you stick to your guns, number one. You know, most guys want a big name in their lead roles. You already had in mind who you wanted. The studio was trying to get you to get big names and you stuck to your guns, which is not easy to do when you're a guy who doesn't have much power. And you're down on your luck. You need the money. I was very much, the rumor was I was getting fired every week. They didn't like my casting because, you know, I had a lot of new actors. No one had heard of Al Pacino.

[00:24:43] We didn't have the money for stars. So we had to find the new kid. When it comes to casting, they wanted Ryan O'Neill for Michael. For Michael. Yeah. Or Redford even. Wow. And when I said, gee, they don't seem, they don't look like Italians. How could you have that? No, Evans correctly said, but the Sicilians can be blonde and blue eyed, which is true. But people don't think of that. But I said, but he's got to have like, since he's a kid who doesn't want to go and be a gangster, he's got to have it like on his face that he's Sicilian.

[00:25:13] Imagine if you didn't stick to your guns, how different that movie would be. Maybe not even the success. Well, and the script was set in modern then the seventies. It wasn't in the forties. Right. It's cheaper to make a movie when it's not period. Right. So I came on this young guy who had no clout at all and said, I want to make it period in New York. They wanted to make it seventies in like St. Louis or somewhere cheaper. Did you go off a budget? Yeah, I did. I did. I would imagine. The movie cost six and a half million dollars and the budget was, they thought they were going

[00:25:43] to do it more for three million dollars. So does your life dramatically change after a success like that? I mean, do you just become the guy who can get any project he wants or anything? Well, yes and no. I mean, they, I was hit by a success that I never imagined. And it was the, I became a different kind of, I became a big important Hollywood director. Right. And you even said originally to the studio, Martin Scorsese would be a much better choice as a director than me for this. For Godfather 2. Yeah. You said it. Yeah. But he's like, was four years younger than me. And they say, ah, who is he? No, no, no, no. You know?

[00:26:13] Yeah. So you ended up doing Godfather 2. It would have been weird if anyone else had done it. Well, but he, he would have done it well, but they, you know, I didn't want to do, I didn't believe that the Godfather was the kind of story that could be serialized. I thought it was a drama and it was over and that was the end. And Michael, you know, kind of corrupted himself. And that was the story. What I could never stand was I would see film snobs who were all about the IMDb top 250 and they would totally pretend to have seen the Godfather. I'm like, okay, what happens in it?

[00:26:43] What happens in it? Oh, Pacino's good in it. Who does he play? What happens in it? No, but thanks for giving, but thanks for showing your hand. You know? I'll tell you, I'll tell you, I'll tell you, I'll tell you my first wife when we were married, my first wife, when we were going out, my father said, have you ever seen the Godfather? We're at the table one night for dinner. And my father goes, you ever see the Godfather? She goes, no, I never did. And everybody dropped their forks at the same time. It's like, it's like, you never saw the Godfather? No, I never particularly cared for it.

[00:27:13] I think it's too well. And I swear there are people I know in my life where they say, I don't like the Godfather. It's too violent. It's just, it's so mobster. I'm like, what do you want? Now I was just like, well, I was just close to saying to somebody one time. No one got tortured last night. I said, I said, I want to say this. I want to say, well, will you say too mobster? You mean it's too Italian for you? It's too, it's too, it's too WAP, Guinea, Ginzo, spaghetti eating, grease, spaghetti bending,

[00:27:41] Greek garlic, greasy t-shirt for you. Is it too, is it too much for you to hear somebody say the words, you know, hey, Gabagool, you know, hey, hey, throw some wine over here, you know, is it too much for saying somebody say the word meatball, garlic, fry up? You know what I mean? Come on. Do you smell the garlic in that movie? I mean, is it something that turns you off? Are you so white bread? You don't know which way the wind blows? Yeah. Christ almighty. I like my white bread. Leave me alone.

[00:28:09] I mean, I can understand someone critiquing how Pacino gets typecast, but De Niro shows a lot of range in even his comedic roles. But it's just like, don't blame an actor's career trajectory off of a great movie where everyone was giving a hundred or like more like a hundred out of 10 in terms of acting and in terms of characterization. And again, who's the guy in the offer that played Pacino? Oh, he was such a good actor. Oh, what was his name?

[00:28:39] He looked just like young Pacino. And I even had the gals in my family even joking. He's like, he's kind of more handsome than Pacino. Yeah. That's what seven young late sixties, early seventies Pacino would look like. Um, God, he was so good because what they really get down. Perfect is how neurotic he is at first. He's like, I, how do I say this line? How do I talk like this? How unsure he is? Yeah. It's like, that's what really did it for me.

[00:29:07] It was just the pressure was on, you know, it's not just the reenacting the facts that some of us know and some of us didn't know. They really went into the, the meat and potatoes, like James said. Now here's how they flavored said meat and potatoes, you know, it's well, you know, and then they, they wanted, uh, they wanted Al Pacino. They, and they couldn't get Al Pacino for a while. Well, they, the, the studio didn't want him. Right. And then they finally settled on getting him, but he's like, well, I I've got a contract with someone else now. Yeah.

[00:29:38] And they ended up trading out his role with Robert De Niro. Uh, the, the, the De Niro thing. And I forget who, what he, what role he replaced him for. I, I can't for the life of me remember. I heard him say something about it being a comedy, but I don't remember what the movie was. Oh, hi mom. Was it hi mom. It might've been, it might've been De Palma's or one of those other movies. Yeah. It was something that Al Pacino was contracted to do. They got him out of the contract and he, and Robert De Niro ended up doing that.

[00:30:07] I think it might've been hi mom. I think you're right. I think it is. It's hi mom. There's two movies he did with De Palma. I remember it's greetings and hi mom. And there was no bloodshed. Cause again, Copeland and Palmer are cool. They're just having to honor the whole contract dispute. I said own your own crime syndicate. How would you like to control all the numbers and horse race betting in your state? How many times have you said, gosh, Jane, all the fellows down at the shoe store own their own crime syndicate.

[00:30:35] They don't make any more money than I do except Jonesy since he's been put in alligator loafers and yet we don't seem to be able to afford one. Well, I guess that's the average conversation. Rancid Institute now makes it possible for you to own your own crime syndicate in simple, easy payments. Yes, indeed. You can be big Louie, big Joe, big Mike, or whatever name or size you choose. When you get your crime syndicate, which of course comes unassembled, you get two airy

[00:31:03] back rooms with a candy store out front, a complete teletype system to all tracks and an autographed 45 foot strip of film from the blackboard jungle. We'll return after these messages. All right, folks, Hal's back here. We've got a 90 minute weekly shack stop. It's growing all over the world. Find it at 2 p.m. and 10 p.m. Eastern time on Mondays, then 3 p.m. on Wednesdays, then

[00:31:33] 7 p.m. on Thursdays. You can catch it on many more radio stations, 99.9 KERV, 1 p.m. Central time, 2 p.m. Eastern on Mondays, then catch the Encore on Thursdays at 5 p.m. Central time, 6 p.m. Eastern. Then catch it Wednesday mornings at 11 a.m. Eastern time, 10 a.m. Central, 1077 K-Twins.

[00:31:57] Then hang out with us Wednesday afternoons on MXTR and Hal Shack Radio, 3 p.m. Eastern time. Then Thursday, get up bright and early with us on 95.7 Web Radio at 6 a.m. Pacific time, 9 a.m. Eastern. Of course, we've got the Friday covered as well.

[00:32:19] 12 p.m. Eastern time on MXTR FM and 10 p.m. Eastern time, 9 p.m. Central, 1077 K-Twins. Find everything on HalShack.com. Welcome to the Better Call Daddy Show, the number one podcast where we admit no matter what happens, Daddy has the advice we need to fix our problems.

[00:32:46] Introducing my dad, Mr. Wayne Friedman. That was good. It would be nice if you could also sing a song. What would the song be? You love Paris in the springtime. I just made up some words to it. I love Rena in the springtime. I love Rena in the fall. That's right. That's good enough. What I do is interview people of interest, share it with my dad, and get my dad's advice. My dad is my hero. Nobody's got my daddy. Oh boy, let's go to grandpa. You like to be a little rebel.

[00:33:16] I tried to rein you in. I have a daughter named Rena that acts just like I did. She's got a son that is not only just like me, but it's just like her. I'm your host, Rena Friedman-Watz. Invite your friends, subscribe, and I'm excited to take this journey with you. Let's dive in. She was teasing this guy with the sword, and she accidentally cut his dick. Oh my God, I'm dying. And then he started to enjoy it. I started going down the phone sex rabbit hole. You've got the wankers, and they jerk off in five seconds, and then they're done because

[00:33:46] A, they don't want to spend money, and B, they're quick. My stepfather had mania. If I'm yelling at one of my kids, that fear, that rigid fear. Mom even said to me, I hope you have a kid just like you. There are lots of people that are being bought and sold right now for profit. If you think you're going to kill yourself, shut up and kill yourself. If you're not going to kill yourself, then shut up, smarten up, and it's all on you. The bullshit ass dad. Wow. When I was 11 years old, I was raped and molested over the course of a year.

[00:34:14] What Jeffrey Epstein had was a sickness inside of him. I am Evan Castrilli Carmichael. I could do anything that I believe that I can. I'm so excited, too. Let's go. Next, on Better Call Daddy with my mom and my grandpa. Stay tuned. Follow us on the web on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram.

[00:34:42] The podcast is available on Podbean, Spotify, iHeartRadio, Anchor, Apple, and anywhere else podcasts are available. Feel free to review our show and leave comments on any of those sites. Thanks a million for listening. It's a jack-to-o-o.